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Things People Said: Courtroom Quotations

Things People Said: Courtroom Quotations
The following quotations are taken from official court records across the nation, showing how funny and embarrassing it is that recorders operate at all times in courts of law, so that even the slightest inadvertence is preserved for posterity. Lawyer: "Was that the same nose you broke as a child?"Witness: "I only have one, you know." Lawyer: "Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?"Witness: "By death." Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?" The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail. Lawyer: "What is your date of birth?" Lawyer: "Can you tell us what was stolen from your house?" Lawyer: "What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?" Lawyer: "Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?" Lawyer: "This myasthenia gravis -- does it affect your memory at all?" Lawyer: "How old is your son, the one living with you?" Lawyer: "Sir, what is your IQ?" Lawyer: "What happened then?"

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Buttered Beere 1588 Recipe Small Goblets Of Buttered Beere From A 1588 Tudor Recipe This is an authentic Tudor Buttered Beere (Butter Beer) recipe from 1588 and a rich, creamy ale (beer) is called for – but don’t get an ale which is too sweet, as we are adding in sugar as well as egg yolks. The best ales (beer) to buy are traditional ‘real-ales’ (or cask conditioned ales) from a British brewery with a good reputation (see the end of the post for recommendations). Most British ales (traditional beer) of this high quality are now exported world-wide – while more modern beers, such as ‘lager’ are not recommended.

funny-animated-gifs from thinknice.com Animated GIFs are graphic files that are composed of multiple different images on top of each other. Together these images are compressed and work together (creating movement) to give the appearance of a mini movie. GIF stands for Graphics Interchange Format. Below we present you with a short collection of eight funny animated GIFs. (NOTE: This page may take a minute or two to load, as this format of image has to load completely before it will play smoothly.)

Law - Cover Letters Contents A. Purpose Your cover letter is as important as your resume because it is often read first and plays a vital role in your quest for an interview. How to Discover Your Life Purpose in About 20 Minutes How do you discover your real purpose in life? I’m not talking about your job, your daily responsibilities, or even your long-term goals. I mean the real reason why you’re here at all — the very reason you exist. Water is dangerous This was found on the newsgroup: rec.humor.funny A student at Eagle Rock Junior High won first prize at the Greater Idaho Falls Science Fair, April 26. He was attempting to show how conditioned we have become to alarmists practicing junk science and spreading fear of everything in our environment. In his project he urged people to sign a petition demanding strict control or total elimination of the chemical "dihydrogen monoxide." And for plenty of good reasons, since: it can cause excessive sweating and vomiting it is a major component in acid rain it can cause severe burns in its gaseous state accidental inhalation can kill you it contributes to erosion it decreases effectiveness of automobile brakes it has been found in tumors of terminal cancer patients He asked 50 people if they supported a ban of the chemical.

29 Semi-Productive Things I Do Online When I’m Trying to Avoid Real Work You don’t always have to work hard to be productive. Productivity can simply be the side effect of doing the right things. So here’s a list of 29 semi-productive things I do online when my mind is set on avoiding ‘real work.’ Check delicious popular tags like ‘useful,’ ‘tutorials,’ ‘tips,’ ‘howto,’ ‘advice,’ ‘entrepreneurship,’ etc. for interesting, educational articles to read.Watch one of the thousands of educational videos streaming at TED.com, Academic Earth and Teacher Tube.Read an online book list and find a new book to grab next time I’m at the library. mummy comics I blame you for the funny looks I get from the people at my office when they hear me laugh thank you for reading. I blame you for the funny looks I get from people in the cafe/bookstore when they hear me CACKLE. thank you for cackling. haha xD i love this one =3 good job ^^

BOOKS TO PREPARE FOR LAW SCHOOL Students often ask me what books would be helpful to read in order too prepare for law school. This is difficult because law school involves complex issues that have not been systematically or well addressed by evangelical scholars and works specifically on human law. As a result, I cannot recommend a single book that will give you a complete perspective on the law. Instead, it is necessary to read a whole variety of books and synthesize the materials in order to come to a proper understanding of human law from a biblical perspective. So for that synthesis, and to prepare yourself for studying human law and understanding legal systems, I would recommend the following:

How to Keep Your Temper at Work (And Everywhere Else) - Marshall Goldsmith by Marshall Goldsmith | 1:14 PM November 26, 2008 This week’s question for Ask the Coach: It’s hard for me to keep my temper, even more so now with the global economic meltdown! Do you have any suggestions on how I can stop from getting angry, especially in the workplace? LOTS OF PUNS ...A guy goes into a nice restaurant bar wearing a shirt open at the collar and is met by a bouncer who tells him he must wear a necktie to gain admission. So the guy goes out to his car and he looks around for a necktie and discovers that he just doesn't have one. He sees a set of jumper cables in his trunk. In desperation he ties these around his neck, manages to fashion a fairly acceptable looking knot and lets the ends dangle free. He goes back to the restaurant and the bouncer carefully looks him over for a few minutes and then says, "Well, OK, I guess you can come in -- just don't start anything." ...This mushroom walks into a bar and starts hitting on this woman...

What’s on Your Bucket List? 101 Things To Do Before You Die “Every man dies – Not every man really lives.” ~ William Ross“The only people who fear death are those with regrets.” ~ Author Unknown A few days ago, I was surfing online when I came across someone’s bucket list. It quickly inspired me to create my own list and write an article about it at the same time. What’s a Bucket List? If you haven’t heard about the term “bucket list”, it is a list of all the goals you want to achieve, dreams you want to fulfill and life experiences you desire to experience before you die. Why Create a Bucket List?

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