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5 minute management course

5 minute management course
Subject: 5 MINUTE MANAGEMENT COURSE Lesson 1: A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that towel." After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. "Great!" Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure. Lesson 2: A priest offered a Nun a lift. The priest removed his hand. Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. Lesson 3: "Me first! "Me next! Lesson 4: Lesson 5: Lesson 6:

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Shakespeare Insult Kit Shakespeare Insult Kit Since 1996, the origin of this kit was listed as anonymous. It came to me on a piece of paper in the 90's with no attribution, and I thought it would make a cool web page. Ermahgerd, memes! A retrospective on this year’s internet quirks and curios It seems 2012 was the year memes went mainstream. Helped largely by the rise of social media and the fact most of us now have an online presence, you’d be hard pushed to find someone who didn’t come across at least one of this year’s memes, mash-ups, viral hits or image macros. We’ve rounded up the best memes of 2012 for you to look back on and laugh at what a long, strange trip it’s been. So, go on, pop the kettle on and let’s have a giggle. Texts From Hillary If the 2012 US election is anything to go by, politics and memes go hand in hand.

Your Age on Other Worlds Looking at the numbers above, you'll immediately notice that you are different ages on the different planets. This brings up the question of how we define the time intervals we measure. What is a day? What is a year? PICTURE JOKES » Just some advice :) First post, 3 years in the lurking. This is me and my Papa (grandpa) He went on a trip last Friday… … and returned on Sunday to find his home of 50 years burnt to the ground. He built that home, but had no insurance (the foundation was on lava rocks). The illustrated guide to a Ph.D. Imagine a circle that contains all of human knowledge: By the time you finish elementary school, you know a little: By the time you finish high school, you know a bit more: With a bachelor's degree, you gain a specialty: A master's degree deepens that specialty: Reading research papers takes you to the edge of human knowledge:

LOTS OF PUNS ...A guy goes into a nice restaurant bar wearing a shirt open at the collar and is met by a bouncer who tells him he must wear a necktie to gain admission. So the guy goes out to his car and he looks around for a necktie and discovers that he just doesn't have one. He sees a set of jumper cables in his trunk. In desperation he ties these around his neck, manages to fashion a fairly acceptable looking knot and lets the ends dangle free. He goes back to the restaurant and the bouncer carefully looks him over for a few minutes and then says, "Well, OK, I guess you can come in -- just don't start anything." ...This mushroom walks into a bar and starts hitting on this woman...

15 Ways to Get Past an Awkward Moment Aug 13, 2012 We’ve all been in awkward situations, our lives are full of them. Nobody’s perfect, but how you handle it can turn an awkward moment into a partial win. Below you will see 15 awkward situations and what these people did to try and turn it around. It might not always work but the best you can do is try, and nobody can take that away from you! (They still might laugh though) Free Beading Patterns - Free Jewelry Patterns You are here Home | Beading Download free beading patterns here at FreePatterns.com! How Famous Companies Got Their Names Ever wondered about how famous brands got their names from? Here are a couple of explanations. Via

Happiness Engineer As a Happiness Engineer, helping people is your passion. Maybe you’ve developed your own support philosophy by reading books like Delivering Happiness or Exceptional Service, Exceptional Profit. Perhaps you’re a contributor in an online support community such as the WordPress.com forums or WordPress.org forums. Our goal is to build relationships based on trust which result in happy, passionate, loyal customers and colleagues through listening to their needs and guiding them to the fullest use of the products we offer. Interested in learning more about how our team works? Check out Andrew Spittle’s talk at UserConf.

Creative Ways of Describing Stupid People (The GOP) Habits explainable if he was raised by wolves. Had a head crash. Half a bubble off plumb. -- attributed to Mark Twain Happiness is seeing her picture on a milk carton. Hard to distinguish from the tail end of a horse. Hard to tell if he has an ace up his sleeve or if the ace ismissing from his deck altogether.

The 30 Best Animals Being Jerks GIFs Because there are few things funnier on earth than animals acting like jerks to humans and one another. So we present our collection of the thirty best animals being jerks GIFs: Monkey Siblings Are Just Like Humans Best Animals Being Jerks GIFs: The Roomba Jerk 60 Selected Best Famous Quotes In this posting you will find my selection of the very best 60 quotes, from nearly a decade of collecting them. They range from the profound to the intriguing to the just plain funny. One way or the other, you’ll surely find many of them to be thought-provoking and entertaining. This selection is, of course, based solely on my personal taste (and even that varies largely from day to day according to my mood). You are welcome to browse the entire collection and look for your own favorite ones or contribute new quotes from your own personal collection.

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