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How to make your friends like you

How to make your friends like you

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Lots of Jokes - Did You Know? Q. Why do men's clothes have buttons on the right while women's clothes have buttons on the left? A. When buttons were invented, they were very expensive and worn primarily by the rich. Since most people are right-handed, it is easier to push buttons on the right through holes on the left. Great Expectations by Charles Dickens, Chapter 23 It came to my knowledge, through what passed between Mrs. Pocket and Drummle while I was attentive to my knife and fork, spoon, glasses, and other instruments of self-destruction, that Drummle, whose Christian name was Bentley, was actually the next heir but one to a baronetcy. It further appeared that the book I had seen Mrs. Pocket reading in the garden, was all about titles, and that she knew the exact date at which her grandpapa would have come into the book, if he ever had come at all.

Stephen Colbert Quotes - Funny Stephen Colbert Jokes - Best Colbert Report Quotes Entertainment Political Humor Share this page on: Send to a Friend via Email Your suggestion is on its way! LOTS OF PUNS - StumbleUpon ...A guy goes into a nice restaurant bar wearing a shirt open at the collar and is met by a bouncer who tells him he must wear a necktie to gain admission. So the guy goes out to his car and he looks around for a necktie and discovers that he just doesn't have one. He sees a set of jumper cables in his trunk. In desperation he ties these around his neck, manages to fashion a fairly acceptable looking knot and lets the ends dangle free.

How to Get a Copy of Your FBI File (idea)@Everything2.com The Freedom of Information Act is a powerful thing. If you've ever wanted to know just what those guvmint bastards have on you, anyway, here's your chance. Just fill in the italics in this form letter with the appropriate information, get your signature notarized, send it off, and you're in business! This should be free, though if your search returns reams of information, you may be charged 5 cents per page in duplication fees. The law says that your request must be responded to within 10 days, but you can expect something closer to 2 or 3 months for a definitive answer with the current backlog of paperwork.

The OSTRICH Story A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke," and Perfect Mac-n-Cheese « My Cooking Quest November 13, 2008 by joejhorn A few weeks ago I started a quest for some good mac and cheese. Nancy makes a killer mac-n-cheese but I wanted my own. I’m sure I frustrate the crap out of Nancy sometimes because I’m always looking for something better when it comes to food and recipes. Now mind you , this mac-n-cheese is not Bobby Flay mac-n-cheese with some crazy-sexy ingredients, but it is really, really good! I would make it for any of my friends and be proud.

The Logo that Fucks The Logo that Fucks Years ago, I was working for a software company, doing their graphics. Then one day they asked me for a new company logo and arranged a meeting with all the partners and coders. Jenny vs. Spencer - StumbleUpon JENNY vs. SPENCER: SPENCER RESPONDS! I'm sure that everyone has seen Jenny quitting via dry-erase board, but now Jenny's mysterious boss has responded the same way.

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