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THINGS YOU LEARN IN COLLEGE « The Career Closet

THINGS YOU LEARN IN COLLEGE « The Career Closet
I had to post this hilarious list from www.funny2.com/collegeBut you don’t learn these things in class Quarters are like gold.Flip-flops become as important as soap, and shampoo. Asleep by 2:30 AM is an early night. New additions to the food groups: Mountain Dew, Doritos, Ben & Jerry’s, Ho-Hos and Oreos. Make sure your alarm clock has back-up batteries. Duct tape heals all wounds. Showers become less important. Sleep becomes more important. 10 minutes is more than enough time to get ready for your first class. Going to the mailbox was never an ego-booster (or ego-breaker) before. You begin to nap again. The book your professor wrote is always required for his class. E-mail becomes your second language. Frat parties are exactly like they are in the movies. Ten-page papers used to sound impossible, now they’re a Godsend. You never realized so many people are smarter than you. You never realized so many people are dumber than you. Professors are like celebrities: you see them, but they never see you.

The Beauty Of Motherhood In The Animal Kingdom (23 Pics) August 9, 2011 | 32 Comments » | Topics: Pictures Excerpts from a Dog and a Cat Diary… Excerpts from a Dog’s Diary… 8:00 am – Dog food! My favorite thing! 9:30 am – A car ride! 9:40 am – A walk in the park! 10:30 am – Got rubbed and petted! 12:00 PM – Lunch! 1:00 PM – Played in the yard! 3:00 PM – Wagged my tail! 5:00 PM – Milk bones! 7:00 PM – Got to play ball! 8:00 PM – Wow! 11:00 PM – Sleeping on the bed! Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary? Day 983 of my captivity. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The bird has got to be an informant.

30 Most Ridiculous Doodles on Drawing Something Draw Something is a mobile app developed by Omgpop. It was one of the Mobile apps which won the Flurry App Spotlight Awards in 2012. In the first five weeks after its launching, the game was downloaded 20 million times. Fifty days after its release, it had been downloaded 50 million times. Recently, both Draw Something and Omgpop were bought by the game giant Zynga for $180 million. Two players alternate turns between drawing a picture for the other to guess. I know I put my Megazord around here somewhere… Megaman has this easy. Love(bug) conquers all. Leave it to Russel to always be prepared with a compass. Hey chain chomp! This takes sibling rivalry to a whole other level. I think I’m tapped out on Star Wars clues. I like how Donkey Kong is professional enough to wear a tie despite having a job of primarily manual labor One small step for toys … One giant leap for toykind… Just glad I didn’t step on that tootsie roll. Who needs a surgeon when you got Dr. Dad-gum! Itadakimasu!

Learning Handouts Skip navigation links ugs : life and learning in sync Sanger Learning Center is UT Austin’s main resource for academic support. Each year, we help more than 20,000 students achieve their academic potential. We are open Monday through Friday, 8 a.m.-5 p.m. Come in for one-on-one or drop-in tutoringImprove your study skills with a learning specialistMeet weekly with a peer academic coachAttend free classes and workshops Learn how self-testing can better prepare you for your next exam. Six Comedians We Wish Would Return to Standup I've always rejected the idea that standup comedy is useful as merely a stepping stone to other things (movies, a sitcom, writing gigs). In my opinion, it’s as noble a final destination as any other. That’s what made Seinfeld documentary Comedian so refreshing to watch — a legendary, insanely-wealthy comic heading enthusiastically back into the standup fray, while a virtual no-name claws and screams as he tries to escape it. That’s not to say that a successful standup shouldn’t venture out into other areas. Here are a few comedians that are overdue for a return to the stage: Jim Carrey His recent return to SNL was a tease — offering an all-too-brief glimpse back inside the mind of a comic genius that has for the most part been wasted for a decade. Maybe he’s lost his spastic comic edge. Adam Sandler A lot of people probably don’t remember him from his days in standup. Eddie Murphy Michael Richards We all know what happened the last time he took the stage in a comedy club. Drew Carey

70 Cutie Baby Animals Bring You a Good Mood Cuteness is usually characterized by some combination of infant-like physical traits, especially small body size with a disproportionately large head, large eyes, and round and softer body features. Infantile personality traits, such as playfulness, fragility, helplessness, curiosity, innocence, affectionate behavior, and a need to be nurtured are also generally considered cute. To those who are living in the concrete jungle, we have collected the following cute animals, hoping they could bring you a good mood and maybe, remind you of the wild world.

Stupid Answers Sure, these kids may think they're pretty clever now, but wait until they're all serving grand slams at Dennys when they're in their 30s. Only in Russia… | sneezl.com “Only in Russia” is a surprisingly popular topic. But what is it people want that’s only available in Russia? Based on internet search data, bizarre answers are revealed. (top weird phrases people enter into search engines with “Russia”; # per year) “from russia with love” – over 140,000 searches per year 1963, Sean Connery, 007, and a story that still thrills… It’s a dated version of Russia that people still love: “is tide laundry detergent sold in russia” – over 50,000 Why on Earth do so many people want to know? “opera in russia salaries” – over 50,000 You know global unemployment figures are bad when… “russia bikini” – over 100,000 searches Possible proof that western men dislike the body types produced by their own western diet? Andrey via Compfight “amber room russia” – over 80,000 Now this is an interesting story. “women saratov russia” – over 80,000 searches According to the online search data, the Russian city of Saratov is a clear #1 destination for people seeking Russian women.

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