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Let's face it, we really trust science. In fact, studies suggest that the vast majority of people will murder another human being, if a guy in a lab coat tells them it's OK. But surely in their insatiable curiosity and desire to put knowledge above all things, science would never, say, inadvertently set off a chain of events that lead to some sort of disaster that ended the world. Right? Well, here's five experiments that may prove us wrong.
Cracked.com's new book is now on sale . What follows is one of the classic articles that appear in the book, along with 18 new articles that you can't read anywhere else. Any dreadlocked white guys finding this article after Googling "Drugs Rule" should know that we've given this list about drugs a rule. To make the cut, an accomplishment has to be considered great by people who could pass a field sobriety test. So no Grateful Dead music.
Humanity's track record with animals has never been stellar. After centuries of ocean dumping, worldwide deforestation, domestication and overhunting, it's safe to say we've got a greasy, opposable thumb in every one of Mother Nature's pies. That's not to say that humanity's only effect on the animal kingdom is pure destruction; in fact, sometimes our ecological footprint looks more like a clown shoe.
Some animals are boring, and that's fine: They're all gathering nuts or looking for mates or marking territory or some stupid shit. Hey, you know, whatever floats your boat, squirrel . We prefer the animals that just straight don't give a fuck: the ones that punch sharks in the dick, ghost-ride somebody else's whip, beer-bong tequila and look you dead in the eye while plowing your girlfriend. Animals like:
If theres two things Cracked is all about, its fucked up animals and dongs. And since they wont let me write The 7 Most Fucked Up Animal Dongs, (Editor's Note: Only because it's been written already ) I had to settle for focusing on just the animal stuff. So hey, here you go: Heres a bunch of adorable animals that will probably nonetheless scar you for life. Let's skip the pleasantries and get right down to hyperventilating and swearing at nature, shall we? Bears are pretty intrinsically scary, but come on look at that guy!
#3. Monkeys and Elephants Practice Family Planning If there's one single thing that separates humans from animals, it's that we actually put some thought into who we'll have sex with. Animals don't plan for a baby; they just hump the nearest female they see and let natural selection take care of the rest. Hell, dogs will hump your leg if they're in the mood. They don't care.
#3. Birds Are Grammar Nazis petinfoclub Spend longer than a half second on the Internet and you'll encounter someone so hung up on correct grammar usage that you suspect he's got sentence diagrams where his ribs should be. And if you haven't, watch this: " Hoke?
This is the fourth installment of our series where we prove that sometimes, real life is stranger than Photoshop (see Part One , Part Two and Part Three ). So enjoy our continuing chronicle of jaw-dropping pics that make you shout "FAKE!" the moment you see them, but in fact are not. Even if, in some cases, we really wish they were ...
Most people have already seen the following images in the WTF sections of social bookmarking sites, in threads dedicated to badass pictures or just circulated through their inboxes by the funny boss. There is never an explanation for these pictures, because they seem to intrinsically defy explanation; they are just still moments in time of unbelievable scope, and epic badassery. It seems hard to imagine what brought about the extraordinary circumstances these images depict, and thats the magic, really - letting your imagination run with these ridiculous situations.
Hey, Hollywood, we get that it's hard to come up with new ideas. Especially when you've gotten really good at improving on the original. But it's one thing to purposefully remake a dud into a classic -- it's another to pretend you're the one who came up with the idea in the first place.
#2. The Hulk Has Rage Issues Due to Child Abuse Marvel Super-Heroes #59 (1976)
Back in the swinging 70s, the McDonald's marketing campaign revolved almost entirely around McDonaldland, a fictional fairy land where French fries grew on trees. It was populated by characters like Ronald McDonald, Mayor McCheese and the Hamburglar, whose obsession with stealing and eating burgers quickly becomes unsettling when you realize that in McDonaldland, hamburgers are people. "A census-taker tried to test me once. I ate his liver with McNuggets and a vanilla milkshake.
Although the G.I. Joe action figures have existed since the 60s, it wasn't until 1982 that they gained personalities, an actual story and their very own nemesis; becoming the G.I. Joe we know and love. And we're not talking about the 1996 "extreme" version which we prefer to ignore and hate. The enemy was of course Cobra, a snake themed terrorist organization with a soft spot in their dark hearts for secret fortresses, giant lasers and parachutes (safety first!).
We've been spoiled by Disney and Pixar. When you think of an animated movie you usually picture something that's pretty damned good (or at least mildly entertaining, if you're talking about Dreamworks). But then there is the dark underbelly of animated film, hacks and zero budget backroom operations trying to make money off these modern classics. The results of their work are amazing, in the way that horrible natural disasters are amazing.