6 Propaganda Campaigns That Backfired Hilariously. Propaganda is basically what happens when a government sprinkles glitter on a turd and then claims that it's unicorn meat.
If done right, the people will eat it up and be thankful for the privilege. But, as we've pointed out before, if done wrong, we end up with hilariously failed propaganda campaigns that achieve the exact opposite of what they set out to do. For example ... #6. Hitler's "Perfect Aryan Baby" Turns Out To Be Jewish GALI TIBBON/AFP/Getty Images After Hitler rose to power, the Nazis began to consider the image problems that could arise from them being perceived as human-shaped garbage bags filled with spoiled autopsy trimmings. USC Shoah FoundationSo ... soiling themselves? After spending days huddled over his new collection of submitted baby pictures, Goebbels finally found a photo of an anonymous, cherub-faced little girl with brown hair and dark eyes. Via infobarrel.com"I don't know what it is, Mein Fuhrer; she just reminds me of someone special.
" 5 Bizarre Ways People Are Fooling Surveillance Systems. Who among us has never felt like hiding from The Man?
I certainly have, and so have you. The 6 Shittiest Ways People Have Woken Up From A Bender. Look at you: You drank too much last night, and now you've woken up in what you sure hope is a puddle of your own urine, with a brand-new tattoo of a fire-breathing dragon screaming the name "Sheila.
" You don't even know a Sheila. Truly, your life is an anthology of poor decisions. But take heart, friend! Pew Pew!: 5 Incredible Lasers That Will Change The World. Tools are how we turned primate starvation into "I'd like my steak rare, with a bottle of red.
" Most of our tools merely obey the laws of physics, but lasers are the laws of physics. We caged quantum mechanics to cut perfect lines through a complicated universe. A single pen laser would tell aliens more about our genius than the complete works of Shakespeare. The laser demonstrates mastery of mind, math, and matter. Shakespeare makes us look like lemmings committed to suicide by misunderstanding. The 5 Actual Happiest Places On Earth. Cynicism is easy to come by when literally any combination of words punched into a search engine reveals twisted pornography and creative racism.
But optimism takes work. That's why we decided to go out of our way to find some of the greatest places on the planet; places that people created simply to try to make existence a bit more awesome for those around them. Here's what we found: #5. A 3,000-Acre Animal Paradise. 23 Bizarre Demands Celebrities Have Made Behind The Scenes. 6 Insane Things You Learn When Your College Goes Bankrupt. Unless your college advertises on TV at 2 a.m., you've probably never thought of it as a place that could up and vanish one day.
Colleges are institutions -- they're not supposed to just disappear like the sketchy taco joint down the street. But sometimes they do, and the implications are staggering. Sweet Briar College, a women's liberal arts school in Virginia, recently announced that it would be shutting down after its 114th year. Cracked talked to senior Kate Dobson to learn what happens when your school goes to that great NCAA division in the sky. #6. Shironosov/iStock/Getty Images. 5 Popular Disney Movies With Bizarrely Gruesome Origins. Disney's adaptations are so sugarcoated you'll lose a foot if you watch too many in one sitting.
But you can hardly blame them, seeing as how old-timey storytellers apparently didn't write fairy tales for kids -- they wrote them to keep jaded serial killers entertained while waiting on death row. For example ... 6 Things Movies Get Wrong About Swords (An Inside Look) In fantasy novels and action movies, we like to see weapons at work but we don't particularly care how they were created, sort of like sausage.
We want to see our protagonist double-wielding pistols while shooting holes in the faces of their enemies, but we certainly don't need a whole montage on who handcrafted those guns. Yet for some reason, swords are different. There's a special place in our hearts for knowing exactly where and how each blade was forged before the hero pokes someone with it. Some swords have even more elaborate origin stories than the characters who wield them. All the stranger then, that no one writing our favorite books and movies ever bothered to google how these weapons are really made. #6.
Toshifumi Kitamura / AFP / Getty If you've spent any time talking to Quentin Tarantino or listening to the pear-shaped vitriol seeping out of comic conventions, you know that the Japanese katana is essentially magic. 6 Things Movies Get Wrong About Swords (An Inside Look) 6 Real-Life Doctors Straight Out Of Horror Movies. Doctors are 1) vital to our continued survival, literally, and 2) terrifying.
This is a profession that routinely involves doing things like cutting people open, replacing their innards, and stitching them up like a character in a Tim Burton movie -- and those are the good doctors who help people and practice medicine responsibly. We are not here to talk about those doctors. Nope, we're here to tell you about the creeps who used the respectability granted to them by their diplomas and white coats (mostly the white coats) to do horrible things, like ... #6. 25 Terrifying Things Kids Suspect About Adulthood. 5 Disasters Caused By Homosexual Superpowers. When we in the gay community got our "Now That You Are Queer" welcome packet, it never said how much responsibility came with it.
It implied that being gay was just a matter of having great sex, awesome parties, and some light weather-changing capabilities. We in no way realized that we were going to cause some of the largest disasters in human history. That's not an excuse, of course. Some of you have been really hurt by our actions, we understand. Who knew that getting married and wanting basic civil rights could be so dangerous to you, the average straight person? Why 'The Big Lebowski' Is Secretly 'Alice In Wonderland' 6 Propaganda Campaigns That Backfired Hilariously. 5 Writers Who Went Crazy While Writing Important Books. We tend to think of writers as indoor types.
Hell, look at us -- we're writing this without pants because they were technically more ice-cream stain than fabric. But, some writers like to get their hands dirty, instead of getting their velvet sweatpants dirty. George Orwell lived in the slums to learn what it was like to be dirty and poor, Hunter. S Thompson hung out with the Hell's Angels ... and the following writers made both of them look like complete pansies. #5. Peterrabbit.com Beatrix Potter wrote the famous Peter Rabbit books, as well as stories featuring Jemima Puddle-Duck, Mrs.
Peter Johnson Entertainments Ltd.You smug little shit. 20 Famous Movie Scenes That Are Hilarious In Reverse. 5 Outdated Things That Are Still Around For Some Reason. Every year when spring cleaning comes around, the question resonating all over America, other than, "How did all that stuff manage to fit in the garage? " is "Why do we still have that? " Whether it's a POG collection or a prom dress or the broken flip phone you were totally going to see about getting fixed five years ago, it is now the centerpiece of a mystery regarding how it survived multiple spring cleanings long past its "use by" date. 5 Ways Atheists Argue Their Cause (That Aren't Helping) Like many writers, I measure success by the amount of hate mail I receive. I was wondering how I could get more when I realized I've never written about religion. Unfortunately, Cracked rejected my premise of "5 Funny Drawings I Did Of The Prophet Muhammad's Butt, And Then Also A Bunch Of Reasons Jews Should Suck It Up Already," so I put some actual thought into the subject.
My mind went to atheism, and the fact that it's developed a bit of a bad rap. "Life is ultimately meaningless; make your peace with oblivion! " is a hard sell. 5 Tips For Busting Out Of Jail (From Someone Who Did It) From The Shawshank Redemption to Ernest Goes To Jail, we love rooting for clever prisoners and the hijinks they get into on their way to freedom.
Darryl Norris is one of those prisoners, and this is the story of his escape. He's not the hero of this story; he's just the main character. Nobody is trying to justify his crimes or his escape -- we just want this up here as a reference in case the government ever catches on to our knockoff Pokemon business. 4 Insane Details Behind-The-Scenes Of Adult Films. 7 Warning Signs Of Advertising Disguised As Articles. The Internet is Advertising Park. We built a wonderful place with amazing technology and thought we could pay for it by keeping advertising safely behind borders where people could look at it and maybe sometimes pet its pretty fur. But the advertising has broken loose now, eating and shitting on everything. These consumervores are clever. Some sneak up on their prey by disguising themselves as real articles, like this extended advertisement for buttered coffee. And since that specific article is the one currently on a predatory rampage, I'm going to use it for every following example.
. #7. Medioimages/Photodisc/Photodisc/Getty Images The difference between a writer and a press secretary is that a writer thinks about their words; the secretary just copies them down and pumps them out. Christopher Robbins/Photodisc/Getty Images"If only I had your creative integrity, Xerox 914. " 6 Stories That Prove U.S. Drug Enforcement Agents Are Insane. The Drug Enforcement Administration doesn't have the greatest reputation.
The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (5/19) 5 Helpful Answers To Society's Most Uncomfortable Questions. "Why Do People Act Like Sexism/Racism/Etc. 6 Insane True Statistics That Laugh In The Face Of Logic. Probability rules our entire lives, but our brains absolutely suck at calculating it. The gambling industry thrives off of this fact -- tell someone they only have a 1-100,000,000 chance of winning the lottery, and they'll say, "somebody's got to win! " 7 Bizarre Gender Stereotypes You Always See In Stock Photos. Stock photos are supposed to be just that: stock. 20 Uneducated Dropouts Who Changed Human History. 5 Insane Stunts From The Craziest Record Label Of All-Time. Casablanca, the disco-centric label that ruled the '70s with campy brio was founded and run by Neil Bogart, a flamboyant character who combined a Berry Gordy-level eye for talent with P.T.
5 Writers Who Went Crazy While Writing Important Books. 5 Writers Who Went Crazy While Writing Important Books. 21 Iconic Pieces Of Pop Culture (That Were Hated At First) 5 Things I Learned About Your Sex Life As A Porn Store Clerk. There are only three things certain in life: death, taxes, and humpin'. Humanity will never get bored of slapping our floppy bits together in new and interesting ways. And to facilitate that genital mashing, we need porn stores. 6 Famous Musicians Who Need To Retire. Apparently, the rock star equivalent of a midlife crisis is reliving your glory days of spandex, groupies, and sold-out world tours. As a music fan, it's sometimes hard to watch the musicians and bands you love turn into living, breathing examples of all the things Spinal Tap tried to warn them about. But there comes a time when we fans have to be honest -- not only with ourselves, but also with the musicians who wrote the soundtracks to our lives. Sometimes, celebrities need a little tough love.
The 10 Cracked Posts Everyone Was Talking About 5/17 Edition. If we're going to keep getting arrested for letting the kids play outside, at least throw us a bone and give us a few cool Kit-Kat flavors and tolerable special effects. 5 Soldiers Who Beat Insane Odds (By Lying Their Ass Off) 6 Dark Secrets Harbored By Your Favorite Foods. 21 Eerily Specific Pop Culture Predictions That Came True. 5 Things Your Parents Did (They'd Be Arrested For Today)
13 Things You Didn't Know You Should Know. 6 Reasons Modern Movie CGI Looks Surprisingly Crappy. The 7 New Wonders Of The World Made By Man. I Hunt Serial Killers: 6 Facts You Thought Movies Made Up. 5 Sets Of Ancient Remains That Have Baffled The Experts. 5 True Stories That Will Restore Your Faith In Famous People. 4 Insane Behind-the-Scenes Details of a Movie Sex Scene. The 9 Creepiest Things Movies Portray as Romantic. 4 Exciting New Technologies for Having Sex (All By Yourself) 4 Insane Details Behind-The-Scenes Of Adult Films. Amway: 5 Realities Of The Multi-Billion-Dollar Scam. 6 Reasons We're Closer To Discovering Aliens Than You Think. 6 Great Movies That Were A Disaster Behind The Scenes. Cracked.com - America's Only Humor Site. 5 Insanely Awful Movie Adaptations From Around The World. 20 Brilliant Background Jokes You Missed In Movies & TV.
The 5 Worst Excuses People Actually Gave For A Hit And Run. The 6 Most Clueless Assholes To Ever Exploit Tragedies. 5 Insane Police Forces No One Ever Talks About. 5 Dark Realities Of Animating Shows Like 'The Simpsons' 6 People Who Put Insane Amounts Of Effort Into Stupid Crimes. The 17 Most Bizarrely Lucky People Who Ever Lived. 5 People Who Laugh In The Face Of Their Disabilities. I Hunt Serial Killers: 6 Facts You Thought Movies Made Up. 5 Insanely Awful Movie Adaptations From Around The World.
5 Ridiculous Cold War Myths You Probably Believe. California: The Secret Murder Capital Of The U.S. 4 Strange Problems Only Celebrities Seem To Have. I Am A Lawyer For Children: 6 Ugly Truths. Movies Secretly Told From The Perspective Of One Character.