You Are A...
Warning: Reading this story may be hazardous to your productivity. The Web sites within may divert you from the dull tasks in need of your attention and may cause you to goof off for hours instead. Oh, who am I kidding? You weren’t going to get any work done today, anyway. So you might as well waste time in style–and these sites will help you do it. Figuring that you’re already familiar with the Facebooks and YouTubes and Onions of the Net, we decided that any further serious undermining of your motivation to labor entailed digging up some obscure nuggets to commingle with the more familiar destinations.
F*** Yeah Grand Rapids
Packing all of your belongings into a U-Haul and then transporting them across several states is nearly as stressful and futile as trying to run away from lava in swim fins. I know this because my boyfriend Duncan and I moved from Montana to Oregon last month. But as harrowing as the move was for us, it was nothing compared to the confusion and insecurity our two dogs had to endure. Our first dog is - to put it delicately - simple-minded. Our other dog is a neurotic German shepherd mix with agonizingly low self-esteem who has taken on the role of "helper dog" for our simple dog.
Grand Rapidians attempt a ritual dance to appease Calder's - and the city's - enlarged heart. “I'm a sculptor and I'm feeling like death, as you would too if you'd just flown into Grand Rapids at some ungodly hour of the morning, only to discover that you can't check into your hotel room for another three hours. As you would too, if you were a sculptor — as I am.” Grand Rapids, Michigan