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Esther Perel: The secret to desire in a long-term relationship

Esther Perel: The secret to desire in a long-term relationship
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Sintropia - Syntropy Why do people cheat? Relationship expert Esther Perel talks to Tony about infidelity, intimacy and the danger of expectations Posted by: Team Tony Listen on iTunes Listen on iTunes Why do people cheat? We tend to think that the act of infidelity is the ultimate betrayal. In this episode of the podcast, Tony sits down with world-renowned couples therapist and relationship expert, Esther Perel, to discuss what makes relationships work, what makes them fall apart – and what we aren’t understanding about infidelity. Esther is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and provocative voices on personal and professional relationships. Over the past ten years, Esther has traveled the world, working closely with hundreds of couples who are struggling to cope with infidelity. In this episode, Esther and Tony invite the audience into an honest, enlightened exploration of modern marriage. [01:25] Tony introduces the episode[03:05] Welcome Esther Perel[03:55] What is different about relationships today? Team Tony

The Opposite of Addiction is Connection Right now an exciting new perspective on addiction is emerging. Johann Harri, author of Chasing The Scream, recently captured widespread public interest with his Ted talk Everything You Know About Addiction Is Wrong, where he concluded with this powerful statement: The opposite of addiction is not sobriety. These sentiments are augmented by a growing number of experts, including addiction specialist Dr Gabor Maté, who cites ’emotional loss and trauma’ as the core of addiction. Limbic Resonance If connection is the opposite of addiction, then an examination of the neuroscience of human connection is in order. How does this relate to addiction? “Humans require social connection” How Our Ability To Connect Is Impaired By Trauma Trauma is well-known to cause interruption to healthy neural wiring, in both the developing and mature brain. Social Solutions To Addiction The solution to the problem of addiction on a societal level is both simple and fairly easy to implement. The Roots Of Healing

Why Freddie Mercury's Voice Was So Great, As Explained By Science A recent study aims to explain the science behind the power of Freddie Mercury's voice. Fox Photos/Getty Images hide caption toggle caption Fox Photos/Getty Images A recent study aims to explain the science behind the power of Freddie Mercury's voice. Freddie Mercury, the late frontman for the legendary band Queen, died almost 25 years ago. What, exactly, made him so great? "Usually, you can sing a straight tone, but opera singers try to modulate the fundamental frequencies," he says. You might be able to hear that vocal fingerprint in the vocals-only version of Queen's hit song "We Are The Champions" below. Herbst recently spoke with NPR's Kelly McEvers about his research on Mercury's voice.

A quoi pense-t-on quand on fait l'amour ? À rien ! Faux. Pendant l’acte sexuel, chacun est traversé de pensées, inhibantes ou excitantes. au lit, notre esprit joue bien des tours à notre corps… voici enfin dévoilés quelques secrets de magie érotique. « Au début de ma pratique, j’ai eu en consultation un homme qui ne pouvait parvenir à l’orgasme qu’en imaginant le chiffre 7, raconte le professeur et sexoanalyste Claude Crépault, auteur des Fantasmes, l’Érotisme et la Sexualité (Odile Jacob, 2011). En phase d’excitation, il voyait défiler dans son esprit 1, 2, 3… Quand apparaissait le 7, il éjaculait. » Fantasme érotique atypique ? « Après quarante ans de recherches sur l’imaginaire érotique, je peux vous affirmer que ce “fétichisme numérique” met en évidence une seule chose : le caractère polyvalent et énigmatique d’Éros, qui peut prendre mille et un visages », reprend le spécialiste. Des pensées taboues Pour autant, le sujet interroge. Des pensées parasites Elles sont plus ou moins encombrantes, mais personne n’y échappe.

The Central Paradox of Love: Esther Perel on Reconciling the Closeness Needed for Intimacy with the Psychological Distance That Fuels Desire “There is hardly any activity, any enterprise, which is started with such tremendous hopes and expectations, and yet, which fails so regularly, as love,” the great humanistic philosopher and psychologist Erich Fromm wrote in his 1965 classic on mastering the art of loving. One chief reason we flounder in this supreme human aspiration is our unwillingness to accept the paradoxes of love — paradoxes like the necessity of frustration in romantic satisfaction and the seemingly irreconcilable notion that while love longs for closeness, desire thrives on distance. How to live with those paradoxes, rather than succumbing to the self-defeating urge to treat them as problems to be solved, is what Belgian psychotherapist and writer Esther Perel explores in Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence (public library). Perel writes: Love is at once an affirmation and a transcendence of who we are.Beginnings are always ripe with possibilities, for they hold the promise of completion.

36 Questions To Help You Fall In Love With Anyone Asking thirty-six specific questions plus four minutes of sustained eye contact is a recipe for falling in love, or at least creating intimacy among complete strangers. Creating a close rapport between people who have just met is difficult, especially in laboratory conditions. But psychologist Arthur Aaron of Stony Brook University created a method for doing just this. After finding Dr. Set I 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. Though not complete strangers, they were not on intimate terms either. "[T]he real crux of the moment was not just that I was really seeing someone, but that I was seeing someone really seeing me. That unexpected state was one of bravery and wonder, transcending the barriers and boundaries erected in day-to-day adult life. Love, she says, is more of a choice than we allow ourselves to believe. Set II 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. Set III 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. Read more at the New York Times Photo credit: Shutterstock

Curcumin improves memory and mood, new UCLA study says Lovers of Indian food, give yourselves a second helping: Daily consumption of a certain form of curcumin — the substance that gives Indian curry its bright color — improved memory and mood in people with mild, age-related memory loss, according to the results of a study conducted by UCLA researchers. The research, published online Jan. 19 in the American Journal of Geriatric Psychiatry, examined the effects of an easily absorbed curcumin supplement on memory performance in people without dementia, as well as curcumin’s potential impact on the microscopic plaques and tangles in the brains of people with Alzheimer’s disease. Leigh Hopper/UCLA Health Dr. Gary Small Found in turmeric, curcumin has previously been shown to have anti-inflammatory and antioxidant properties in lab studies. The double-blind, placebo-controlled study involved 40 adults between the ages of 50 and 90 years who had mild memory complaints. The paper’s authors, in addition to Small, are Prabha Siddarth, Dr.

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