Words on Pictures | SadAndUseless.com. Too Many Questions... Random Thoughts of People Our Age. Crazy English from Beautiful Perth. 1. The bandage was wound around the wound. 2. The farm was used to produce produce. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. Let's face it - English is a crazy language. And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which an alarm goes off by going on. HOW TO TICK PEOPLE OFF. FOR THOSE WHO TAKE LIFE TOO SERIOUSLY.
Things My Five-Year Old Has Said, Which I Have Quoted on Twitter. Things To Remember If I Ever Become an Evil Overlord. Why americans should never be allowed to travel. I had someone ask for an aisle seats so that his or her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?
" I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information when she interrupted me with "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts. "Without trying to make her look like the stupid one, I calmly explained, "Capecod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa. " Her response ... click. A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada? " Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. A nice lady just called. I just got off the phone with a man who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on? "