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One Cop vs 25 Stoners&Video. HOW TO TICK PEOPLE OFF. Things People Said: Courtroom Quotations. The following quotations are taken from official court records across the nation, showing how funny and embarrassing it is that recorders operate at all times in courts of law, so that even the slightest inadvertence is preserved for posterity.

Things People Said: Courtroom Quotations

Lawyer: "Was that the same nose you broke as a child? "Witness: "I only have one, you know. " Lawyer: "Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated? "Witness: "By death. " Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse? " The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail.

Lawyer: "What is your date of birth? " Lawyer: "Can you tell us what was stolen from your house? " Lawyer: "What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? " Lawyer: "Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like? " Lawyer: "This myasthenia gravis -- does it affect your memory at all? " The-baffling-pinocchio-paradox-17605-1277075492-29.jpg from

“How can I help you today, ma’am?” Client: “Is... Me: “How can I help you today, ma’am?”

“How can I help you today, ma’am?” Client: “Is...

Client: “Is e-mail internet”? Me: “I beg your pardon?” Client: “Is e-mail on the internet? I have no internet, can I still read my e-mail?” Me: “Well yes, you must be able to get online to view your e-mail.” JPG Dump. Funny-animated-gifs from Animated GIFs are graphic files that are composed of multiple different images on top of each other.

funny-animated-gifs from

Together these images are compressed and work together (creating movement) to give the appearance of a mini movie. GIF stands for Graphics Interchange Format. Below we present you with a short collection of eight funny animated GIFs. (NOTE: This page may take a minute or two to load, as this format of image has to load completely before it will play smoothly.) Enjoy… Something of that Ilk. Famous World Ideologies, as explained by references to Cows. Gamebook: Mario Cant Take a Joke. Jesus-vs-batman.jpg from 10 cents a minute. Metalheads FTW - 30215.jpg?v=1 from Zombie-5-second-20100805-063017.jpg from MiscPix on each Click!

183.png from The-what-do-i-look-like-game-32282-1278684684-1.jpg from Worth the read (I did not write this, I found it on the net) Look at Reality, Now Back at Me. Luke Skywalker Haircut. -social-facepalm-1307073628.jpg from Mummy comics. I blame you for the funny looks I get from the people at my office when they hear me laugh thank you for reading.

mummy comics

I blame you for the funny looks I get from people in the cafe/bookstore when they hear me CACKLE. thank you for cackling. haha xD i love this one =3 good job ^^ An analysis on why rape jokes are so funneh. that post you linked to makes a good point. however, this is not a rape joke; this is a joke about clichéd story ideas. many writers use sexual abuse as a story mechanism. i was making a comment on the absurdity of using something like rape as a way to move the story forward or develop characters. not that i have any qualms about making comics about anything i find interesting or meaningful or absurd, but i thought i should explain this one because it is getting a lot of traffic and seems to be provoking a knee-jerk reaction from more than a few people. thank you for commenting.

Hey, that’s not funny. Why Captain Higgins is my favorite parasitic flatworm. %7Be4e28807-361d-44b2-8681-b42f76405d24%7D.gif from Somuch.jpg from Forever Alone Prank Flash Mob. Calvin and Hobbes Snow Art Gallery. Random funny pictures. Nothing to see here, move along! picture, in album: Another 50+ Animated...

Thor Gets Shit Done at Kontraband. wP9vz1.gif from McDonald vs KFC. Cell Phones. 756.gif from Weather_reporting_tool.jpg from List of unusual deaths.

This is a list of unusual deaths.

List of unusual deaths

This list includes unique or extremely rare circumstances of death recorded throughout history, noted as being unusual by multiple sources. Some of the deaths are mythological or are considered to be unsubstantiated by contemporary researchers. Oxford Dictionaries defines the word "unusual" as "not habitually or commonly occurring or done" and "remarkable or interesting because different from or better than others. Cyanide &Happiness #675.

Operating Systems. Tech Support: "May I ask what operating system you are running today? "Customer: "A computer. " A girl walked into the computer center where I work. She said she was having problems with her Mac. I asked what kind of Mac she had. In an indignant voice, she replied, "Duh, Intosh.

" Tech Support: "What operating system are you running? After conferring with her husband, it turned out she owned a Macintosh with System 8.1. Fun Fact: Identifying all of those references is the first test in becoming... New Piracy Ad. Funny & Stupid Customer Quotes & A Large Can Of... (Around my restaurant area a lot of kids hang out, most of whom are the unfavorable type.

Funny & Stupid Customer Quotes & A Large Can Of...

This day in particular, one of them decides to open the door and swear at everyone inside/) Kid: “All of you are f***ing b****es!” (We ignore it and try to continue work as if nothing happened.) Kid: “F*** you, f***ing pigs!” (We ignore it again and this repeats for another two times. Kid: “Girls should stay in the kitchen!” Me: “Hey, stop that or I’ll call security.” Kid: *looks at me up and down* “Whatever! (The kid continues to talk dirty and make gestures to me, so I cut it off there.) Me: “Get out of here before I start breaking your legs.” (The kid looks shocked, probably because he didn’t expect anyone to snap back at him.

Mother: “Look, my son told me you threatened to break his legs! One megabite. Muffins.jpg from Everytime I hear people complain about online gaming, I wish they could... Estimation. Dtr-xbox-live-racist.jpg from Random funny pictures. Lets watch a video on youtube, class. IRL Trolling. Communication skills - zefrank. Cyanide &Happiness #1995. Copy this into your blog, website, etc.

Cyanide &Happiness #1995

<a href=" alt="Cyanide and Happiness, a daily webcomic" src=" border=0></a><br />Cyanide & Happiness @ <a href=" ...or into a forum [URL=" & Happiness @ [URL=" Xbox360-500x472.jpg from Waiter-rage.gif. H2O, too: Watch out for poisonous homophones. I Raff I Ruse. 2011-05-15-dream-a-little-dream-of-pee.png from 74441_1436034831114_1540260283_30979112_5233448_n.jpg from Funny & Stupid Customer Quotes & Emulation Alienation. (Note: It takes me ten minutes to determine the caller is actually on a Mac running a Windows emulation program.)

Funny & Stupid Customer Quotes & Emulation Alienation

Me: “Does your mouse have one big button?” Funny & Stupid Customer Quotes & Search Results ... This…Is…Spyware!

Funny & Stupid Customer Quotes & Search Results ...

Customer: “Hi, my son says that I have spartans on my laptop and I should bring it to you guys.” Me: “…Ma’am? Spartans?” Customer: “Yes, I called my son at school and told him that screens keep popping up all the time, and he said that I have spartans.” Epic troll. Gamarjobat - Amazing Comedy Duo.