The Bureau of Communication - Fill-in-the-blank Correspondence. 1253944120290.jpg Photo by krotx. One man's soap nightmare. This is so funny I actually cried when I read it. It's an exchange between a guy staying in a London hotel and the staff of the hotel. The letters were sent to The Sunday Times. Dear Maid,Please do not leave any more of those little bars of soap in my bathroom since I have brought my own bath-sized Imperial Leather. Please remove the six unopened little bars from the shelf under the medicine chest and another three in the shower soap dish.They are in my way.Thank you,S.
Berman Dear Room 635, I am not your regular maid. The 6 bars on your shelf I took out of your way and put on top of your Kleenex dispenser in case you should change your mind. My instructions from the management are to leave 3 soaps daily. Kathy, Relief Maid Dear Mr. The assistant manager, Mr. I have assigned a new girl to your room. Thank you. Elaine Carmen, Housekeeper. Dear Miss Carmen,It is impossible to contact you by phone since I leave the hotel for business at 7:45 AM and don't get back before 5:30 or 6PM. Thank you, Dog Diary vs. Cat Diary. The Cat's Diary Day 983 of My Captivity My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. Disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
Red Eye. If Popular Websites Were Pokemon » MakeUseOf Geeky Fun. Puzzles. Things People Said: Courtroom Quotations. The following quotations are taken from official court records across the nation, showing how funny and embarrassing it is that recorders operate at all times in courts of law, so that even the slightest inadvertence is preserved for posterity.
Lawyer: "Was that the same nose you broke as a child? "Witness: "I only have one, you know. " Lawyer: "Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated? "Witness: "By death. " Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse? " The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail. Lawyer: "What is your date of birth? " Lawyer: "Can you tell us what was stolen from your house? " Lawyer: "What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? " Lawyer: "Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?
" Lawyer: "This myasthenia gravis -- does it affect your memory at all? " Lawyer: "How old is your son, the one living with you? " Lawyer: "Sir, what is your IQ? " Lawyer: "What happened then? " 20 Hysterical Roommate Notes. 11 Awesomely Incorrect Test Answers from Kids from You're Doing It Right.