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How To Be Resilient: 8 Steps To Success When Life Gets Hard

How To Be Resilient: 8 Steps To Success When Life Gets Hard
“Stick with it!” “Be resilient!” “Never give up!” I see a lot of stuff about resilience, persistence and grit. What I don’t see is a lot of legitimate info on how to actually increase those qualities. How can we be more resilient? So I looked at the most difficult scenarios for insight. When life and death is on the line, what do the winners do that the losers don’t? Turns out surviving the most dangerous situations has some good lessons we can use to learn how to be resilient in everyday life. Whether it’s dealing with unemployment, a difficult job, or personal tragedies, here are insights that can help. 1) Perceive And Believe “The company already had two rounds of layoffs this year but I never thought they would let me go.” “Yeah, the argument was getting a little heated but I didn’t think he was going to hit me.” The first thing to do when facing difficulty is to make sure you recognize it as soon as possible. Sounds obvious but we’ve all been in denial at one point or another. M. Sum Up Tags: Related:  How To Build ResilienceResilience

A Special Forces Officer Teaches You 5 Secrets To Overcoming Adversity Life can be really difficult sometimes. We all deal with it. But how do top performers overcome challenges? And what can we learn from them? Who knows about overcoming adversity? So I called Mike Kenny. Most of what you may think you know about Special Forces is wrong. SEALs and Rangers specialize in “direct action” and “special reconnaissance.” They’re good behind the gun, no doubt, but they spend a lot of their time working with people — and usually people who don’t speak their language and don’t share a common culture. Here’s what you can learn from Special Forces training about overcoming adversity. 1) Prepare, Prepare, Prepare We often wait until the hurricane hits us to think about how we’re going to cope with it. Via Masters of Chaos: The Secret History of the Special Forces: The Special Forces are not a rapid deployment force; the secret of their success is intensive preparation. Many of the benefits that come from preparation are obvious. And what’s the best way to prepare? Tags:

An Antifragile Way of Life “How can you think yourself a great man, when the first accident that comes along can wipe you out completely.” — Euripides Buster Benson with some excellent thoughts on how to live an antifragile life. An antifragile way of life is all about finding a way to gain from the inevitable disorder of life. A Navy SEAL Explains 8 Secrets To Grit And Resilience Sometimes you just want to quit. You know you shouldn’t but nothing seems better than crawling back into bed and hiding under the covers. (I am there right now, actually, with my laptop.) The emerging science of grit and resilience is teaching us a lot about why some people redouble their efforts when the rest of us are heading for the door. Research is great, but it’s always nice to talk to someone who’s been there firsthand, and to see how theory holds up against reality. So I gave my friend James Waters a call. James and I talked for hours but what struck me was how much of what he had to say about SEAL training and his time in the teams aligned with the research on grit, motivation, expertise and how people survive the most challenging situations. So what can the SEALs and research teach you about getting through life’s tough times? 1) Purpose And Meaning To say SEAL training is hard is a massive understatement. How do you get serious? And the research backs James up. 2) Make It A Game

The Brains of Successful vs. Unsuccessful People Actually Look Very Different What's the best way to take control of your own life and push yourself against boundaries? According to Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck, it's all about your mindset. Successful people tend to focus on growth, solving problems and self-improvement, while unsuccessful people think of their abilities as fixed assets and avoid challenges. Dweck says that there are two basic categories that peoples' behavioral traits tend to fall into: fixed and growth mindsets. Image Credit: Brain Pickings A person with a "fixed" mindset tends to view themselves with static traits and a deterministic outlook. A person with a "growth" mindset, on the other hand, sees challenges as things to overcome and views failure as an opportunity for growth and personal development. In the end, Dweck says, how we approach life can determine our success and happiness. "Believing that your qualities are carved in stone — the fixed mindset — creates an urgency to prove yourself over and over. The result? Tom McKay

What I Do When it Feels Like My Work Isn't Good Enough | James Clear In the beginning, it was easy. There was no pressure. There were no outside eyes. When I started writing, I wrote in a private document for over a year before I published my first article on After a few months of sharing my work publicly, things began to change. As I developed an audience, I noticed that I began judging my work. Thankfully, I didn’t let my self-doubt stop me from writing. In a way, this is true. The Inner Game of Tennis I just finished reading a book that has been on my reading list for quite some time, The Inner Game of Tennis by Timothy Gallwey. In particular, there was one quote from Gallwey that made me pause and rethink my early months of writing and self-doubt. “When we plant a rose seed in the earth, we notice that it is small, but we do not criticize it as “rootless and stemless.” Ambition and contentment are not opposites, but we often make the mistake of thinking that they are incompatible. The rose seed, however, is both content and ambitious.

Resilience Factors Developing Resilience - Career Development from Overcoming and Growing From Setbacks Learn how to bounce back from setbacks. © iStockphoto/AndrewJohnson I have not failed. According to legend, Thomas Edison made thousands of prototypes of the incandescent light bulb before he finally got it right. In spite of struggling with "failure" throughout his entire working life, Edison never let it get the best of him. It's hard to imagine what our world would be like if Edison had given up after his first few failures. In this article, we'll examine resilience: what it is, why we need it, and how to develop it; so that we have the strength and fortitude to overcome adversity, and to keep on moving forward towards our dreams and our goals. The Importance of Resilience Resilience (or resiliency) is our ability to adapt and bounce back when things don't go as planned. According to the research of leading psychologist, Susan Kobasa, there are three elements that are essential to resilience: In our Expert Interview with Dr. Developing Resilience

7 Ways to Bounce Back from Life’s Inevitable Setbacks It’s your choice… To be positive and free or to be imprisoned by your own negativity. To live in the past or to be hopeful about the present. Full disclosure: I set myself a challenge recently, and I’ve been failing at it. To help motivate a private coaching group Angel and I have been working with, I set a goal to exercise for one hour every day for 90 days straight. I chose this lofty goal because several of the group members struggled with motivating themselves to get to the gym. But I’ve struggled far more than I had anticipated. It’s such a minor setback, but it’s made me feel a little depressed at times. Now, as you may know from previous posts, Angel and I have had much bigger setbacks in the past: losing breadwinning jobs, failed business ventures, financial turmoil, having our possessions wiped out by a hurricane, losing siblings and best friends to illness, health issues, and so forth. So that’s the basics of what I’ve been going through during my recent setback. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

The Key to Success: 3 Emotions Highly Accomplished People Share Yesterday, the final piece of a puzzle fell into my lap, a puzzle I've been working on for the past 10 years. I've been trying to build a model for how emotions create success, but I kept on getting tripped up when I came to gratitude. I was categorizing it as a result of success or a form of success. And that didn't seem quite right, somehow. Here's the missing puzzle piece: A study soon to be published in the journal Psychological Science proves that people who are grateful are willing to wait longer for a financial reward. Bingo. 1. As I mentioned above, a new study shows that people who feel gratitude are more likely to delay financial gratification. In business, patience is extraordinarily valuable. Why are some people so effective at dealing with employees, colleagues, coworkers, and customers, while other people are constantly frustrated and angry and do things that alienate those around them? So here's the first formula: Gratitude=>Patience=>Timing=>Success 2. 3.

5 Ways to Stay Mentally Strong When You’re Not Feeling “Good Enough” Email “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” ―Eleanor Roosevelt Do you ever feel like you’re not good enough? I bet you do! I know the feeling. Every day we’re comparing apples with oranges – comparing our insides with other people’s outsides. In fact, if she’s truly great, she likely is panicking inside. The late and great Maya Angelou, a renowned novelist and poet, once said, “I have written 11 books, but each time, I think ‘Uh-oh. And in today’s always-connected world it’s even harder to keep things in perspective. So with all of this in mind, if you’re not feeling “good enough” right now, it’s time to adjust your thinking. Reminder: Have you checked out our book? 1. It’s not outside forces that make us feel something, it’s what we tell ourselves about what’s happening that creates our feelings. The next time you run into an obstacle and feel inner resistance, don’t look at what’s around you. 2. Where you are right now is a necessary step. 3. 4. 5. Your turn…