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Taming the Mammoth: Why You Should Stop Caring What Other People Think

Taming the Mammoth: Why You Should Stop Caring What Other People Think
We made a fancy PDF of this post for printing and offline viewing. Buy it here. Part 1: Meet Your Mammoth The first day I was in second grade, I came to school and noticed that there was a new, very pretty girl in the class—someone who hadn’t been there the previous two years. Her name was Alana and within an hour, she was everything to me. When you’re seven, there aren’t really any actionable steps you can take when you’re in love with someone. But for me, it became suddenly relevant a few months later, when during recess one day, one of the girls in the class started asking each of the boys, “Who do youuu want to marry?” Disaster. I was still new to being a human and didn’t realize that the only socially acceptable answer was, “No one.” The second I answered, the heinous girl ran toward other students, telling each one, “Tim said he wants to marry Alana!” The news quickly got back to Alana herself, who stayed as far away from me as possible for days after. Part 2: Taming the Mammoth No. Related:  Self-ImprovementSocial Skills

L’accoutumance hédoniste : prendre conscience de son bonheur Imaginez. Vous avez gagné au loto. À vous la Bentley avec chauffeur, la villa en Floride et les chaussons chauffants pour votre toutou. L’extraordinaire est devenu banal. « En psychologie positive, on nomme « habituation [hédoniste] » le phénomène d’usure et d’habitude envers ce qui nous rend heureux ou joyeux : dès lors qu’une source de bien-être ou de bonheur est présente chaque jour de notre vie, nous l’oublions peu à peu, et elle perd sur nous son pouvoir de nous rendre heureux. » Ça vous parle ? « Nous adorons tout ce qui est nouveau mais nous nous y habituons très vite avant de complètement cesser de l’apprécier. Et nous voilà, courant d’Iphones en Iphones, de bijoux en bijoux, pensant que le prochain Graal sera enfin le bon, celui qui rassasiera une bonne fois pour toutes notre soif de félicité intérieure. Alors, comment fait-on durer le plaisir ? Arrêter de vouloir posséder les choses simplement parce qu’elles sont belles. Pensez-vous être un accoutumé hédoniste ? P.S.

How To Get People To Like You Before we commence with the festivities, I wanted to thank everyone for helping my first book become a Wall Street Journal bestseller. To check it out, click here. Meeting new people can be awkward. What should you say? How can you make a good impression? Research shows relationships are vital to happiness and networking is the key to getting jobs and building a fulfilling career. But what’s the best way to build rapport and create trust? Robin Dreeke can. Robin was head of the FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Program and has studied interpersonal relations for over 27 years. Robin is the author of the excellent book, It’s Not All About “Me”: The Top Ten Techniques for Building Quick Rapport with Anyone. I gave him a call to get some answers. You’re going to learn: The #1 secret to clicking with people.How to put strangers at ease.The thing you do that turns people off the most.How to use body language like a pro.Some great verbal jiu-jitsu to use on people who try to manipulate you. Here’s Robin:

NaPoWriMo Quelles sont vos motivations ? Chacun de nous a en lui des réserves d'énergie qui ne demandent qu'à s'investir dans les réalisations les plus variées. Ces forces intérieures ressemblent un peu à des ressorts prêts à se détendre. Seulement voilà : les ressorts de motivations sont différents d'une personne à l'autre. Tout le monde n'est pas motivé de la même façon par le sport, la création artistique, le service des autres, l'organisation... En matière de motivation professionnelle, c'est la même chose. Devenir un spécialiste Certains vont aimer se spécialiser dans un secteur ou un type de travail qui les passionnera. Devenir dirigeant Vouloir exercer de hautes responsabilités et être le manager de l'entreprise... Etre indépendant, avoir de l'autonomie Certains vont avoir plus que tout besoin de se sentir libres et autonomes. Trouver un poste stable et sécurisant Pour certains au contraire, il sera primordial d'avoir un travail stable qui leur permette de vivre paisiblement ainsi que leur famille.

Psychic Vampires Psychic Vampires are not to be confused with the stereotype images of Vampires that are afraid of the light and suck blood from their victims in the night. The term "Psychic Vampire" is used metaphorically to refer to people whose influence leaves a person feeling drained, exhausted, unfocused, depressed, or chaotic. They are also known as Energy Vampires, Emotional Vampires, Pranic Vampires, Astral Vampires, and Elemental Vampires. For this page, I will exclusively refer to them as Psychic Vampires. Psychic Vampires in Human Form: These human Psychic Vampires are people that we have all encountered many times within our lives. • Bitchy People: People who bitch and complain all the time leave you with a negative feeling. • Needy People: These people are always needing your energies, your money, your time, and help on a constant basis. • Physically Abusive People: They drain your energies by beating it out of you. • Narcissist: The narcissist lacks self-esteem and feels empty.

5 Ways to Stop Worrying About What Everyone Thinks of You You could spend the whole year worrying about what other people think of you, but it wouldn’t get you anywhere. “What’s wrong with wanting others to like you?” That’s what several of our course members asked me in response to one of my recent course member emails. And I’ve been asked similar questions over the years too. In a nutshell, tying your self-worth to everyone else’s opinions gives you a flawed sense of reality. From wanting others to think we’re attractive, to checking the number of likes and comments on our Facebook and Instagram posts, most of us care about what others think. As we grow up, we learn to separate our thoughts and emotions from everyone else’s, but many of us continue to seek – and in many cases beg for – positive social validation from others. As human beings, we naturally respond to everything we experience through the lens of our learned expectations – a set of deep-rooted beliefs about the way the world is and how things should be. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

Meanwhile In America, Brown Girls Are Still Dreaming Le concept de valeur selon Schwartz Les valeurs sont un concept central dans la vie publique. Pour de nombreux auteurs (Tocqueville, Weber, Durkeim), les valeurs sont fondamentales pour expliquer l’organisation et le changement, au niveau de la société comme à celui des individus. Elles ont joué un rôle important non seulement en sociologie, mais aussi en psychologie, en anthropologie et dans l’ensemble des disciplines connexes. On les utilise pour caractériser les individus ou les sociétés, pour suivre le changement au cours du temps, et pour expliquer les motivations de base qui sous-tendent attitudes et comportements. Beaucoup de conceptions différentes de cet objet de recherche ont alors émergé, mais l’utilisation des valeurs en sciences sociales a souffert de l’absence de consensus concernant la conception des valeurs de base, leur contenu et la structure des relations qu’elles entretiennent les unes avec les autres. Suite : les différentes approches pour l'étude des valeurs

Stop Chasing Happiness: 17 Alternative Ways to Live a Great Life “If only we’d stop trying to be happy we’d have a pretty good time.” ~Edith Wharton I have a question for you. What would you be willing to sacrifice to be happy? Would you be happy to let go of Netflix? Would you be willing to take up a monastic life? Every single day of the year we’re being sold happiness. The problem with happiness is that no one really knows exactly what it is. So four years ago, on New Years Eve, I made the pledge to myself to stop trying to be happy. Don’t get me wrong. So instead of saying to myself, This year I’m going to be happy, I said, This year I’m going to try new things. And if I’m not happy, well, I’m not happy, but at least I’ve had some interesting experiences. The result of this was the best (and probably happiest) year of my life, at least up to that point. It’s more like a place you occupy than an object you obtain. A large part of what less than happy people have is a problem with their patterns of attention. 1. If you find yourself asking, Am I happy?

The skills gap at work … that no one is talking about The skills gap at work … that no one is talking about On Feb. 4, 2004, the first handful of users at Harvard University logged onto the newly launched, the predecessor to Facebook. Just a dozen years later, 2 billion people — nearly one-third of the planet — are on social media. The speed at which adoption has spread is almost certainly unprecedented in the history of the world. No wonder companies — and their employees — are struggling to keep up. Just one small problem: The contemporary workforce is woefully underprepared for the challenges ahead. What’s behind the social skills gap? The reason for this skills shortfall? At the same time, how social media is used in the workplace is fundamentally changing. Employees are being asked to apply social media in new and unexpected ways. But this approach only works if employees are on board and up to speed. Finding ways to bridge the social skills gap Fixing this social skills gap is no short order.

The Middle Manager’s Oath - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency (To be recited by corporate managers and senior managers each morning while looking in a full-length mirror, topless, and flexing their biceps.) I will empower my team to find their own solutions to those problems, which I do not want to deal with myself. I will be decisive in making crucial decisions that I do not trust my team enough to make themselves. I will evangelize the use of data-driven decision-making because my gut tells me it’s the right thing to do. I will take expense reports extremely seriously, much more seriously than the HR Code of Conduct, which does not apply to me. Because I have no life outside of work, I will expect the same of my team. I will take credit for any project I named. If an important executive disagrees with something I say, I will apologize for my choice of words and then rephrase it in a way that makes it seem like we were actually in agreement all along. I will never contradict myself. I will drop names. One of my opinions is worth three of your facts.