Emotional Intelligence: The Social Skills You Weren't Taught in School How Emotionally Intelligent Are You? Here's How To Tell What makes some people more successful in work and life than others? IQ and work ethic are important, but they don't tell the whole story. Our emotional intelligence -- the way we manage emotions, both our own and those of others -- can play a critical role in determining our happiness and success. Plato said that all learning has some emotional basis, and he may be right. "What having emotional intelligence looks like is that you're confident, good at working towards your goals, adaptable and flexible. The five components of emotional intelligence, as defined by Goleman, are self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, social skills and empathy. Not sure how emotionally intelligent you are? 1. Do you love meeting new people, and naturally tend to ask lots of questions after you've been introduced to someone? Being curious about others is also a way to cultivate empathy. 2. Exceptional leaders often have one thing in common, according to Goleman. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13.
How to Be Emotionally Intelligent Photo What makes a great leader? Knowledge, smarts and vision, to be sure. Realistic self-confidence: You understand your own strengths and limitations; you operate from competence and know when to rely on someone else on the team. Emotional insight: You understand your feelings. Resilience: You stay calm under pressure and recover quickly from upsets. Emotional balance: You keep any distressful feelings in check — instead of blowing up at people, you let them know what’s wrong and what the solution is. Self-motivation: You keep moving toward distant goals despite setbacks. Cognitive and emotional empathy: Because you understand other perspectives, you can put things in ways colleagues comprehend. Good listening: You pay full attention to the other person and take time to understand what they are saying, without talking over them or hijacking the agenda. Compelling communication: You put your points in persuasive, clear ways so that people are motivated as well as clear about expectations.
Being Human Creates Higher Returns It seems odd to think that business leaders are just now recognizing that their business results have a direct correlation to the organizations ability to think, act, speak and feel in human terms. Yet instead of measuring the organizations human abilities leaders still focus on measuring, thinking and chasing outcomes in financial terms. Consider what business has done as a result of social technology. For most instead of looking at the enhanced human dynamics created with the technology they have merely made it a tool to extend marketing efforts. Instead of using the technology to enrich their company’s culture they have restricted the use of it at work. It is no wonder corporations have lost credibility with people. As humans we enjoy lots of freedoms and the greatest of all is choice, or used to be. We are free to think, feel, act and speak unless we choose to use such things to cause undo harm onto others then our freedoms become reckless. An 11-year study by John P.
Signs That You Lack Emotional Intelligence Executive Summary Often, emotional intelligence is the key differentiator between a star performer and the rest of the pack, yet many never embrace the skill for themselves. Do you think being liked at work is overrated? Are you surprised when others are offended by your comments, and do you feel like they’re overreacting? You might be lacking in emotional intelligence, but there are strategies to help you improve. A critical component of emotional intelligence is self-awareness, so get feedback to help you understand what your problematic behaviors are. In my ten years as an executive coach, I have never had someone raise his hand and declare that he needs to work on his emotional intelligence. Take Craig (not his real name), a coaching client of mine, who showed tremendous potential and a strong ability to drive results for his company. Here are some of the telltale signs that you need to work on your emotional intelligence: So what do you do if you recognized yourself in this list?
Something’s fishy You open an email containing an unfamiliar link. If the email is from a friend, chances are you'll open it. But if it's from a stranger, you'll probably assume it's a virus or, at best, annoying spam. Our most basic everyday decisions rely on trust. On the other hand, there are plenty of reasons to be distrustful, says Ruth Mayo, PhD, a psychologist at the Hebrew University in Jerusalem. As scientists study this essential facet of our lives, they're learning that trust — and its skeptical stepsister distrust — can influence our behavior and cognition in ways good, bad and surprising. Have less, trust more Most people equate trust with integrity, says David DeSteno, PhD, a social psychologist at Northeastern University and author of the upcoming book "The Truth About Trust." At its essence, trust is about opening yourself to others. That position of weakness is precisely what allows society to function, says Paul Piff, PhD, a social psychologist at the University of California, Berkeley.
The Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence Some of the greatest moments in human history were fueled by emotional intelligence. When Martin Luther King, Jr. presented his dream, he chose language that would stir the hearts of his audience. “Instead of honoring this sacred obligation” to liberty, King thundered, “America has given the Negro people a bad check.” Delivering this electrifying message required emotional intelligence—the ability to recognize, understand, and manage emotions. Recognizing the power of emotions, another one of the most influential leaders of the 20th century spent years studying the emotional effects of his body language. Since the 1995 publication of Daniel Goleman’s bestseller, emotional intelligence has been touted by leaders, policymakers, and educators as the solution to a wide range of social problems. Emotional intelligence is important, but the unbridled enthusiasm has obscured a dark side. Social scientists have begun to document this dark side of emotional intelligence.
Why is it proving so hard to root out homophobia? | David Robert Grimes | Science Despite numerous studies showing increased acceptance of homosexuality in many countries as a natural and healthy part of the sexual spectrum, a disturbing new wave of homophobia seems to be sweeping the world. In Russia, Vladimir Putin's government has reduced its gay citizens to the status of pariahs, banning them from expressing the sentiment that their relationships are on a par with that of heterosexuals. Uganda has passed an abhorrent anti-gay law. Even in the US, the archetypal first-world democracy, lawmakers in Arizona have just passed a bill allowing businesses to refuse – on religious grounds – to serve homosexuals. It was only prevented from progressing because governer Jan Brewter exercised her veto. Even relatively liberal Europe still has some hang-ups about sexual orientation. The term homophobia itself can be problematic, because it implies a pathological or irrational fear. There are several reasons why sexual prejudice might persist. Religion is a case in point.
Stop Calling It Soft Skills! John Dillon is an entrepreneur who has been wildly successful as VP of sales for Oracle and CEO of start-ups that have been solid investments for staff and investors. His secret to success? John Dillon is empathic, caring, and effective in communicating both the big picture and the details. Tracy Ashdale is the executive director of Philadelphia-based Girls on the Run. She has built a program that offers training for coaches and transformative experiences for girls, empowering them to run a 5K while learning life skills. Rod Beckstrom, co-author of The Starfish and the Spider, is a serial success story. Kathie Powell is the CEO of Petaluma Health Center in Northern California. All four of these managers, as well as countless other leaders, are experts and experimenters in human skills. I think the following are human skills that every leader, manager, and employee must be encouraged to demonstrate (and we should evaluate their success): Advertisement