6 Insane Versions of Famous Cartoons They Almost Made. In a business full of endless reboots and remakes, maybe nothing in Hollywood gets recycled more than animation. Since cartoon characters aren't associated with any one actor (in the audience's mind) studios feel even more free to come up with endless revamps starring the same characters. But even with Hollywood's low, low standards, some shows wind up too ridiculous to see the light of day. Way back in the year 2010, DC Comics began developing yet another new Batman cartoon series. Though Batman has already been reimagined from pretty much every possible angle, this series was set to be Batman's Smallville, exploring Bruce Wayne's formative years at Gotham High.
You know there would have been at least one episode where the Joker learned about the dangers of drug abuse. Based on the concept, this isn't a bad idea. Or ... maybe not. It's a brave gym coach who runs that detention hall. Is it actually possible for him to be more of a whiny bastard? Roger Rabbit vs. the Nazis For the most part. 9 Famous Movie Villains Who Were Right All Along.
Being a movie villain is not easy. Nobody respects your work, everyone loves your sworn enemy, and cheers if he straight up murders your ass. Of course, the villains deserve it, right? Well, actually Hollywood is littered with supposedly evil characters that, when you take a step back and ignore the cackling laughter and yellow teeth, were clearly the ones getting screwed over. Here are the so called bad guys who got the rawest deals of all: #9.
Edward Rooney (Ferris Bueller's Day Off) The "villain": Mr. Above: The eyes of an educator. Hold on a minute there: Let's get the obvious out of the way: this is his goddamned job. The movie glosses over the fact that Ferris couldn't read And you know what? And we're asked to sit back and say, "serves him right for caring about the future of our country! " Suddenly the recession makes sense. #8. The Night of Broken Glasses would end differently. If they require licenses for concealed handguns, they should probably keep this guy on file too. #7. . #6. Awful Romantic Comedies They'll Probably Make Next Article. 8 Actors Who Look Exactly The Same on Every Movie Poster. In Zoolander, Ben Stiller plays a male model who only knows how to make one facial expression in front of a camera: Blue Steel.
Most of us have Facebook friends with their own version of Blue Steel -- a particular facial expression (or if they've had a few drinks, body part) that comes out every time someone tells them to say cheese. Well, it turns out that some of Hollywood's most iconic actors are no different when it comes to selling their movie. For instance ... Eddie Murphy Raises His Eyebrow Eddie Murphy has this thing he can do with his eyebrow that he wants you to check out. Murphy appears to be looking out at us from inside this fish out of water comedy, and saying, "You believe these Hollywood assholes?
" Then he brought it out for The Golden Child, where he used it to say, "You believe these Chinese assholes? " "You believe these Hollywood assholes paid me to make this movie? " He doesn't break it out for Dr. Eyebrow. Do you think that theory's too far fetched, Mr. Eyebrow? Huh. 5 Diabolical Animals That Out-Witted Humans. Whether or not humans are the smartest species on the planet really depends on which animals and which humans you base it on. After all, sometimes when people match wits with members of the animal kingdom, it doesn't turn out well for the humans. Mud Creek Grizzly vs.
Scientists What's the most badass job in science? Yeah, we guessed Mr. Wizard too, but that was before we knew there was such a thing as "grizzly bear trapper. " Back in the late 90s, a team of these badass biologists were doing their thing in the Glacier National Park, managing to capture and release grizzly bears without getting their soft, academic bodies torn to shreds in the process. Like the other notable smart bear Yogi, the MCG found maiming to be pedestrian, and preferred the more subtle route of professional sabotage. The researchers set up their bear catchi- um, bear research station, complete with traps, bait and cameras. Once his work was done, MCG stopped and scanned the crime scene. A bear? Holy shit. 7 Horrible Ways The Universe Can Destroy Us Without Warning. You know what the universe is? A total dick, that's what. You know what else it is? A giant microwave oven. If you tune your TV set between channels, part of the "snow" that you see on the screen is background noise caused by cosmic radiation.
You can also hear this phenomenon as a low, humming hiss behind all other noise. It was first found when two lab rats were trying to calibrate a giant hearing horn yet kept getting this strange farty sound no matter how they filtered the results. Of course, that's just the background radiation. Via Wiki CommonsThis is called a horn antenna. How It Will Get Us: While cosmic rays aren't able to deliver microwaves powerful enough to do what an actual microwave oven does (i.e., explode us like hot dogs), other kinds of rays out there are more than capable of harming our machinery and turning us into walking tumor farms. GettyHey, is it cool to start spraying CFCs again? OK! GettySo at least you know one thing is getting cooked up there.
Just once a day. 8 Scenes That Prove Hollywood Doesn't Get Technology. As we have previously mentioned, hilarious things happen when writers try to write characters who are smarter than themselves. For instance, I don't doubt that some research goes into writing the medical jargon on House, but we all know that at some point they fake it. And that's fine, because what percentage of the audience is composed of not only doctors, but genius doctors? It's probably not even half.
But that's why it's so baffling when Hollywood fucks up every scene involving computers or video games. They not only get everything wrong, but give us the most insulting bullshit imaginable on details it would have taken two minutes to Google. So we wind up with scenes like this ... (Note: Credit goes to the tech savvy gang at the NeoGAF forums for hunting down many of these clips, and countless others). NCIS -- Two People Sharing a Keyboard Let's assume you know absolutely nothing about computers.
So it's the navy cop show NCIS, and they're under a hacker attack! Ah, who am I kidding? 6 Statistically Full of S#!t Dangers The Media Loves to Hype. If there's one thing we've learned from our elders it's that death is a big shit sandwich, and we've all gotta scarf it down one day. Assuming you're not a robot who can simply transfer your consciousness into a new body when the Reaper comes a-knocking, you've probably spent a little time pondering what is going to take you out in the end. Chances are you're worrying about the wrong sandwich. Statistics show that the bogeymen behind some of the most widespread fears and phobias are downright toothless.
At least when compared to the seemingly innocent stuff you didn't know could take you out at any moment. For instance ... What's More Dangerous than Sharks? Cows. Jaws, Deep Blue Sea and countless Syfy originals all tell us that sharks are killing dudes left and right. And then we call this guy. The media love to get in on the shark action, too. It actually turned out later that shark attacks were down when compared with previous years. Lazy-ass sharks. What You Should be Afraid of: Cows. 7 Basic Things You Won't Believe You're All Doing Wrong. If you're like us, you might sometimes have a problem with complex tasks, like trying to drive an ambulance and send a text message at the same time.
But hey, at least most of us have figured out the simplest things that get us through the day, right? Except, you know, some of the simple things we've done every day of our lives, like ... What could be simpler than taking a good crap? Even babies are good at it. You might be surprised, then, to find out that even those of us who can burp without throwing up get this wrong every single day. The one who just threw up on the other one's shoulder is better at pooping. Chances are the pooping facility nearest you is a sitting toilet, a relatively recent invention that flushed its way into mankind's heart with the advent of indoor plumbing in the 19th century.
GettyFuture toilets will exist just to kill us. So how the hell are we meant to do it? Luckily, there's a relatively simple way to end this poop dilemma. GettyDemonstrated here. 6 Baffling Flaws in Famous Sci-Fi Technology. As a species, we are tool makers first and foremost. That's why we love to see gadgets in our movies, and to watch our Captain Picards and Batmans and David Hasselhoffs defeat the bad guys with technology we know we'll never own. But in the course of trying to dazzle us with their fancy spaceships and battle vehicles, sometimes Hollywood forgets to make sense.
The dreaded Imperial Walker, or All Terrain Armored Transport, is frequently considered the single coolest vehicle in the entire Star Wars universe. The moment the rebels spotted these things on the horizon in The Empire Strikes Back, the only question was exactly how much of their stuff they could pack before they flew screaming off the planet. "Fuck it! Leave the porn, leave everything! The Flaw: In addition to being huge battle robots of death, the Imperial Walkers also boast a blind spot in excess of 300 degrees. This is not a minor issue. "Two targets for the price of one.
The DeLorean Time Machine Sure, Dr. Mr. "Look, Marty! 6 Hilarious Ways Game Designers Are Screwing With Pirates. Piracy accounts for 31 percent of all Internet traffic and, regardless of your personal opinion on the issue, it really does suck for a lot of game developers. But rather than just try to sue the pants off of everyone who ever logs into Bittorrent, some have started thinking outside the box a little. These clever folks use much more subtly cruel methods to punish pirates. Like ... Arkham Asylum Turns You Into a Clumsy Batman What makes Arkham Asylum so great is that it's the first video game to properly depict exactly how much of a badass Batman can be.
Man, fuck imagination. In Arkham Asylum, video game Batman finally lives up to his full potential -- unless you pirated the game, that is, then he pretty much sucks. What They Did: The developers included a little bit of extra code to detect when the game has been pirated, a common tactic used to track a company's losses or simply mess with cheap people. "Ohhhhh nooooooo. " Wonder how that worked out for him? Command & Conquer: Not so much. A World of Warcraft World: 10 Ways Online Gaming Will Change the Future. Once again, if this seems ridiculous and alien, remember how many societies had (hell, still have) arranged marriages, often where the groom didn't see the bride's face until their wedding night.
Wasn't the change from that to the modern method of getting matched up with girls by Internet dating sites just as strange? Aristotle said it best: "Society is a house, change is a tornado full of woodpeckers. " 8. There will be a branch of government to rule the virtual world. If we're going to make theft illegal in the metaverse (and hackers will always devise ways to steal, or at least vandalize, digital goods), someone has to make and enforce those laws. Obviously no team of IT guys or game moderators will get to decide how the everyday lives of billions are lived, arbitrarily giving and taking goods and abilities as they see fit. Would not a common punishment in the virtual world be to shave a foot off a person's height and add 150 pounds to their weight? But wait, there's more. 9. 10. How The Inevitable Human-Robot War Will Start Article.