How to Appreciate What You Have - Stop Comparing Yourself to Others. “If only I had a job that paid more… If only I were born with a bottomless trust fund … If only I could afford a bigger house…” So many of us live in a perpetual state of wanting more—more money, more shiny new toys, more things.
And we chase those material possessions with more gusto than we pursue what’s been empirically shown to increase happiness: more joy, more experiences, and more time. What gives? Studies show that rich people aren’t any happier day-to-day than the rest of us. In fact, many are more stressed and spend less time doing enjoyable activities. If you want to start learning to appreciate what you have and stop wanting more, try these scientifically-proven strategies from psychologists: Appreciate What You Have by Practicing Gratitude People who are grateful are more satisfied with their relationships with friends and family. Get to Know Someone Who Doesn't Have What You Have Appreciate What You Have by Giving More Want to get the biggest bang for your buck? Self-Compassion Exercises by Dr. Kristin Neff. Selfcareafterrape: The Basics: Common Responses... What's Missing When We Talk About Self Care (Ask BGD 1) Selfcare_printable.pdf.
It's time to tune in: Deepika Mittra at TEDxEdmonton. 20 Reminders Every Feminist Needs (But No One's Telling Us) Back in 2013, my friend (and would-be lover, if not for our pesky current monogamous relationships) Jes Baker wrote an incredibly important blog post called “Things No One Will Tell Fat Girls… So I Will,” in which she details 14 affirming reminders for a group that is always torn down.
The piece was so wildly popular (and rightly so) that she turned the concept into a book – “a handbook for unapologetic living” – due out in October. (Psst. Pre-order it.) And that got me thinking about feminists. More specifically, it got me thinking about how often I receive messages from feminists around the world who are feeling despondent, downtrodden, and disheartened – because they live in a world that hates feminists, and they are so rarely validated in their quests for justice and struggles with the movement. 1. Let’s start here: Being a feminist in a world that so vehemently hates women (and—pshh—never mind feminists), in and of itself, is a brave act. And that’s amazing. 2. Like Sailor Moon. 3. 4. Want to Exercise Out of Self-Love and Not Self-Hate, But Have No Clue Where to Start? Try These 4 Suggestions.
I’ve written previously about the challenges I face while exercising as a kind of curvy lady.
I’ve shared with you all that it can be really tough to exercise in a world that assumes that exercise for women is for weight loss only – and for a kind of fat lady, there is no space for an alternative narrative. That’s fucked up. And I think a lot of you Everyday Feminists know that, too. I received a lot of e-mails and notes after publishing that article, asking how exactly I came to a place where I could feel confident and comfortable building an exercise routine out of self-love instead of body shame.
How exactly did that process unfold for me? And I get the sense that folks want a five-step program for gaining the capacity for loving self care in the form of exercise at any size. But unfortunately, it’s not that simple. Because being able to do anything – anything, including exercise – out of self-love is so, so worthwhile. I don’t have a simple five-step program. 1. 2. 3. 4. Not a Typical Before and After Fitness Journey. Nope, this is NOT a mistake!
You are seeing these photos labelled correctly! Stunned? Yes, the BEFORE photo is what you would typically see as an AFTER photo. So what’s the real difference between the BEFORE and AFTER photos, and why am I posting this up? Besides the obvious physique changes – the first photo is of me post figure competition in 2008 at about 117lbs and let’s say about 15-17% bodyfat, and the latter is a photo of me today, post workout. The REAL difference is what you CAN’T physically see just from looking at the photos…which is that I’m a lot more comfortable in my own skin and body in the AFTER photo (i.e., TODAY). My intention of posting these photos is to inspire those of you who struggle with your body image and/or weight to honor and relax into the beautiful body you have now, regardless of your body’s shape and size.