Math_fail_picture2.jpg (470×358) Math vs. Engineering. 12 Days of Christmas. I-Heart-Math_210-l.jpg (600×400) Geometry Saved Me Money. Verizon Math Fail from That Happened! MATH HUMOUR. This page includes a few mathematically humourous jokes and sayings that any mathematician can appreciate!

The jokes contain something essential about mathematics and the mathematical way of thinking. Enjoy! Q: What did zero say to eight? A: Nice belt!! Q: What do you call a mathematician's bird that won't eat? Q: How does one insult a mathematician? Q: Why do you rarely find mathematicians spending time at the beach? Life is complex: it has both real and imaginary components. Q: How do mathematicians induce good behavior in their children?

Theorem: Every positive integer is interesting. Q: What is purple and commutative? Let epsilon be less than zero... In some alley, a function meets up with a differential operator: "Get out of my way - or I'll differentiate you till you're zero! " Top ten excuses for not doing homework: I accidentally divided by zero and my paper burst into flames. Salary Theorem: The less you know, the more you make. Math jokes, humor, and poetry. We're moving!

I'm in the process of dismantling this joke site and migrating it over to a more accessible, easier-to-update blog. You can check it out at Let epsilon be less than zero. However, until the move is completed, I'm keeping this archive available... but note that more and more of the links will forward you to their new home. Math Jokes > Debate about the box. An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are trying to set up a fenced-in area for some sheep, but they have a limited amount of building material.

The engineer gets up first and makes a square fence with the material, reasoning that it's a pretty good working solution. "No no," says the physicist, "there's a better way. " He takes the fence and makes a circular pen, showing how it encompasses the maximum possible space with the given material. Then the mathematician speaks up: "No, no, there's an even better way. " To the others' amusement he proceeds to construct a little tiny fence around himself, then declares: "I define myself to be on the outside.

" Visit the previous joke about this topic! Math Geek: Gifts For A Geek. t005.jpg (360×211) Chch-atheist.gif (304×377) 5jsosl (373×276) All.gif (887×900) Numbers.gif (420×420) Math-made-fun.jpg (440×300) Motivational Pictures. It_is_obvious.PNG (PNG Image, 744x616 pixels) Cheating the Cheat Sheet. Bayesian Inference. FoxTrotMathTest.jpg (625×800) 61639_442470958737_648693737_5119985_7852550_n.jpg (286×700) Funny Math Quotes. Quotes « Let ε < 0. The four branches of arithmetic — ambition, distraction, uglification and derision.

(Lewis Caroll, Alice in Wonderland) As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality. (Albert Einstein) If you can’t explain what you are doing to a nine-year-old, then either you still don’t understand it very well, or it’s not all that worthwile in the first place. (Albert Einstein) Only two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former. The two most common things in the Universe are hydrogen and stupidty. I’ve heard that the government wants to put a tax on the mathematically ignorant. Old mathematicians never die; they just lose some of their functions. I turn away with fear and horror from this lamentable plague of functions which do not have derivatives.

Mathematics is a game played according to certain simple rules with meaningless marks on paper. Pick Up Lines Galore - Math Pick-up Lines! Savage Research, Humor: Math Knowledge. Two mathematicians were having dinner in a restaurant, arguing about the average mathematical knowledge of the American public.

One mathematician claimed that this average was woefully inadequate, the other maintained that it was surprisingly high. "I'll tell you what," said the cynic. "Ask that waitress a simple math question. If she gets it right, I'll pick up dinner. If not, you do. " "When my friend comes back," he told her, "I'm going to ask you a question, and I want you to respond `one-third x cubed.' The cynic returned from the bathroom and called the waitress over.

The waitress looked pensive; almost pained. So the cynic paid the check. 7x13=28. Kentucky Math with Ma and Pa Kettle!