Kids talk Science This page is brought to you by UC Berkeley Parents Network Back to the Jokes & Quotes Collection THE FOLLOWING ARE ALL QUOTES FROM 11 YEAR OLDS' SCIENCE EXAMS: * "Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water." * "Artificial insemination is when the farmer does it to the cow instead of the bull." * "When you breathe, you inspire. When you do not breathe, you expire." * "H20 is hot water, and CO2 is cold water." * "Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes, and caterpillars." * "Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire." * "Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas." * "The body consists of three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abominable cavity.
Stefano Unterthiner Photography : Animals Face to Face Colt + Rane Stefano Unterthiner Photography : Animals Face to Face What we SHOULD have been taught in our senior year of high school All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2015 Matthew Inman. Please don't steal. TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2015 Matthew Inman. Please don't steal. TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP
The Problem With Social Networks "Social Networks" like Facebook are booming -- especially Facebook. There's only one problem with them: to communicate there, members pretty much have to write. How can that be a problem? After all, all of us learned to write in school, right? Well, no! Rachel: "I'm board." Abigale to Darcy: "You shouldn't be aloud to talk." Post: "Never leave facebook open. Catrina: "Just found out the US is bombing Labia...THAT SUCKS!... Cory: "DONT LET YOUR EMOTIONS OVER POWER YOUR INTELIGENCE'S" Alexa: "seriously?" Poster: "when is the point when you no that you cant fail worse?" And here's why this happens: Alyssa: "honer roll now with mostly a's and 1 b hopping for princapals honer roll next time :-)" Lee: "Just curious, does your school give spelling tests?" That, and: Post: "....thank you Massachusetts for making it impossible for me becoming a teacher. Yeah. Posted May 13, 2011 11:00 AM « Marketing Explained | Home | Random | Newspaper Correction of the Month » Category: Online life -- Prev: No!
The Book Surgeon (15 pieces) Using knives, tweezers and surgical tools, Brian Dettmer carves one page at a time. Nothing inside the out-of-date encyclopedias, medical journals, illustration books, or dictionaries is relocated or implanted, only removed. Dettmer manipulates the pages and spines to form the shape of his sculptures. "My work is a collaboration with the existing material and its past creators and the completed pieces expose new relationships of the book’s internal elements exactly where they have been since their original conception," he says. "The richness and depth of the book is universally respected yet often undiscovered as the monopoly of the form and relevance of the information fades over time. Dettmer is originally from Chicago, where he studied at Columbia College. Update: Read our exclusive interview with the Book Surgeon here. Brian Dettmer's website
8 rules for dating my daughter This page is brought to you by UC Berkeley Parents Network Back to the Jokes & Quotes Collection 8 rules for dating my daughter Copyright 1999 W. Bruce Cameron ==> Please do NOT remove the copyright from this essay! <== When I was in high school I used to be terrified of my girlfriend's father, who I believe suspected me of wanting to place my hands on his daughter's chest. He would open the door and immediately affect a good-naturedly murderous expression, holding out a hand that, when gripped, felt like it could squeeze carbon into diamonds. The opinions and statements expressed on this page are those of parents who belong to the UC Berkeley Parents Network and should not be taken as a position of or endorsement by the University of California, Berkeley.
3D Paintings on Panes of Glass Using multiple layers of clear glass, Canada based David Spriggs and Chinese born Xia Xiaowan, transform flat artwork into 3D sculptures. Viewers are treated to different shifting perspectives of the works based on where they stand in the art space. Spriggs work revolves around powerful explosive imagery, often resembling storms, cosmic blasts or firework like explosions. See Also INCREDIBLE 3D ILLUSTRATIONS JUMP OUT OF THE SKETCHBOOK For more on David Spriggs see his beautiful website at davidspriggs.com or for more on Xia Xiaowan see Wikipedia Above and Below: Xia Xiaowan’s distorted 3D figures Artist: Xia Xiaowan Below: David Spriggs beautiful paintings fill the room with stormy emotion. Artist: David Spriggs Artist: David Spriggs Source: amusingplanet.com
How Twilight Works All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2015 Matthew Inman. Please don't steal. TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2015 Matthew Inman. Please don't steal. TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP Coolest. Stage. Ever Nov 29, 2010 Check out this incredible floating stage on Lake Constance in Bregenz, Austria. The Bregenzer Festspiele (Bregenz Festival) has become renowned for its unconventional staging of shows. Verdi’s opera, “A Masked Ball” in 1999, featured a giant book being read by a skeleton. HOW TO WRITE GOOD Caveat emptor. Carpe diem. O si villi, si ergo, fortibus es in ero. Et tu, brute. by Frank L. Visco My several years in the word game have learnt me several rules: Avoid alliteration.
Why teachers Drink You learn something new every day. Usually, how dumb yet another person is. Why do teachers drink? We drink because we know that we have had some influence in the lives of people like: Michele Bachmann – Click Here for more Donald Trump Charlie Sheen – How the Charlie Sheen drug works – CLICK HERE Why teachers drink These are actual answers to test questions in the classroom! That means this material has been studied for a period of time before the test questions were asked (just so you non-teachers know) One of my favourites: I used to put this on my History tests as a bonus question to help the students get some extra marks. When was the war of 1812? One of my students wrote, ‘That’s not fair, we haven’t studied that yet!’ * Q: Name six animals which live specifically in the Arctic. A: Two polar bears, and Three – sorry not three – Four seals why teachers drink, very funny email forward, funn y test answers Teacher: Who had a worldwide hit with “It’s A Wonderful World”? Student: I don’t know. 1. 2. 3.
How to Suck at Facebook All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2015 Matthew Inman. Please don't steal. TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2015 Matthew Inman. TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP If World War I Was a Bar Fight Germany, Austria and Italy are standing together in the middle of a pub when Serbia bumps into Austria and spills Austria’s pint. Austria demands Serbia buy it a whole new suit because of the new beer stains on its trouser leg. Germany expresses its support for Austria’s point of view. Britain recommends that everyone calm down a bit. Serbia points out that it can’t afford a whole suit, but offers to pay for the cleaning of Austria’s trousers. Russia and Serbia look at Austria. Austria asks Serbia who it’s looking at. Russia suggests that Austria should leave its little brother alone. Austria inquires as to whose army will assist Russia in doing so. Germany appeals to Britain that France has been looking at it, and that its sufficiently out of order that Britain not intervene. Britain replies that France can look at who it wants to, that Britain is looking at Germany too, and what is Germany going to do about it? Britain and France ask Germany whether it’s looking at Belgium. The End….
Girlfriend 1.0 To: Tech Support Last year I upgraded Girlfriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure. In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization where it monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Pokernight 10.3 and Beerbash 2.5 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected. I cannot seem to purge Wife 1.0 from my system. See other random stuff Send feedback on this page Go to