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How to Tell a Loved One 'I'm Angry'

How to Tell a Loved One 'I'm Angry'
Updated April 16, 2011 12:01 a.m. ET "Darling, can we talk? "I know you didn't mean to upset me, but you did. I'd like to clear the air so we can quickly and maturely move on to enjoying our relationship again." Sound familiar? In a culture where it's easy to fire off a snippy email or text, most of us have a hard time honestly expressing anger face to face. None of this, of course, is healthy for us or our relationships. Recently, I took a personality test for a column about how these psychological instruments can help us communicate better with our loved ones. This would explain how we sometimes can get so angry at someone we love that we lash out and hurt them. Like most things, we learned this behavior—how to show, or not to show, anger—from our parents. Russ Wooten, a 40-year-old bartender in Hendersonville, N.C., who grew up in a polite Southern family, says his parents never allowed themselves to get mad in front of him; if they started to argue, they sent him to his room. Mr. Mr.

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The Top 10 Psychology Studies of 2010 The end of 2010 fast approaches, and I'm thrilled to have been asked by the editors of Psychology Today to write about the Top 10 psychology studies of the year. I've focused on studies that I personally feel stand out, not only as examples of great science, but even more importantly, as examples of how the science of psychology can improve our lives. Each study has a clear "take home" message, offering the reader an insight or a simple strategy they can use to reach their goals , strengthen their relationships, make better decisions, or become happier.

10 Brilliant Social Psychology Studies Ten of the most influential social psychology experiments. “I have been primarily interested in how and why ordinary people do unusual things, things that seem alien to their natures.Why do good people sometimes act evil?Why do smart people sometimes do dumb or irrational things?” –Philip Zimbardo Like eminent social psychologist Professor Philip Zimbardo (author of The Lucifer Effect: Understanding How Good People Turn Evil), I’m also obsessed with why we do dumb or irrational things. The answer quite often is because of other people – something social psychologists have comprehensively shown.

Perception puzzles, Visual Perception, Optical illusions and Paradoxes This page illustrates that our visual perception cannot always be trusted. The components of an object can distort the perception of the complete object. Our mind is the final arbiter of truth. The Double Life of Women Step into any bar or party and it won't take you long to spot her. She's the woman with the ringing laugh, the daring clothes, the magnetic appeal that has drawn a circle of admirers around her. If the room were a solar system, she would be the sun—and at the outer reaches, you notice, are several other women seated quietly in her shadow. Why does this woman command all the attention? Psychologists, image experts, and dating advisers propose a host of explanations: It's her extraverted personality, her come-hither look, her approachable persona. But an evolutionary biologist observing the scene would offer a more surprising interpretation, one that may help explain barroom dynamics and much more: It's her "real" time of the month.

Color Survey Results « xkcd Who in the rainbow can draw the line where the violet tint ends and the orange tint begins? Distinctly we see the difference of the colors, but where exactly does the one first blendingly enter into the other? So with sanity and insanity. —Herman Melville, Billy Budd Orange, red? Learned Helplessness The Misconception: If you are in a bad situation, you will do whatever you can do to escape it. The Truth: If you feel like you aren’t in control of your destiny, you will give up and accept whatever situation you are in. In 1965, a scientist named Martin Seligman started shocking dogs. He was trying to expand on the research of Pavlov – the guy who could make dogs salivate when they heard a bell ring. Seligman wanted to head in the other direction, and when he rang his bell instead of providing food he zapped them with electricity.

How To Train Yourself To Be In The Mood You Want Dec 27, 2010 When you have major changes going on in your life, or you’re just frustrated about where you are, it’s easy to get trapped in a cycle of depression, bad moods and frustration. I know, I’ve been there … and when I’m not careful, I still get there more than I want to. But when I’ve had a particularly hard time, I hit these moments where I’m in a foul mood, or I’m just feeling paralyzed, and I’m just stuck. Sometimes I just stew in that and stay there, but sometimes I actually get intelligent and pull my way out of it.

How to tell in 15 minutes whether someone likes you - by Bridget Webber Bridget Webber's image for: "Body Language that Shows when someone of the Opposite Sex Fancies you" Caption: Location: 6 Random Things (Other Than Drugs) That Reduce Pain Your nearest drugstore is full of completely fake pain remedies, from shoe magnets to magical ground-up shark bones. But while these new age medicines are little more than placebos, science has found a whole lot of unexpected -- and downright weird -- ways you can control pain without ever swallowing a pill. Things like ... There is more to life than money.

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