The OSTRICH Story A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?" "I'll have the same," says the ostrich. The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke." The ostrich says, "I'll have the same." Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change. This becomes routine until the two enter again. "The usual asks the waitress?" "No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad," says the man. "Same," says the ostrich. Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, "That will be $32.62." Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table. The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time?" found an old lamp. me two wishes. would always be there."
>How-To: Newsprint Manicure « A Pretty Penny I saw this newsprint manicure over on The Daily Nail and thought it was adorable (especially for bookworms and word lovers like myself). I did a little Google detective work to see how to recreate it, and was surprised at how easy it is! All of the tutorials I found called for vodka or other clear distilled spirits, but we were fresh out. I used isopropyl alcohol instead, and it seemed to get the job done. Like this: Like Loading...
Achievement Unlocked! — Evil Routers Achievement Unlocked! 175 comments I had a little fun with an online achievement generator (and stole some from a Something Awful thread). If you work in IT for any period of time, I’m sure you can relate. P.S. If you like these, you may get a laugh out of “You know you’re a computer security guy when …” and “10 Things Your IT Guy Wants You to Know” also. Completed In Progress Someday? { 174 comments… read them below or add one } Next Comments → Leave a Comment { 1 trackback } [Website] Achievement Unlocked Copyright © 2008–2015 Null Ventures LLC. Disclosures • Terms of Use 6 secrets I learned at makeup artist school total-beauty TODAY Style TODAY Jan. 12, 2012 at 9:50 AM ET Totalbeauty.com / By Sharon Yi, TotalBeauty.com You could say that I have a love/hate relationship with makeup. But then there are those days when my liner refuses to go on straight, my bronzer makes me look like an Asian Snookie, or my lashes refuse to curl. I had one of those days last week, and after walking into work wearing two very different winged tips on my eyes, my editor assigned me a new story: Go to makeup school and write about it. Want to see the best techniques I picked up without spending the thousands of dollars (and crazy amount of time) it takes to go to makeup school yourself? Lesson No. 1: Spend some bucks on your tools At Napoleon Perdis' Makeup Academy in Hollywood, Rebecca Prior, NP's National Educator, begins the first lesson by introducing us to our tools. Here are the eight basic brushes you need: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. Once you have your tools, you need to know how to hold them.
What we SHOULD have been taught in our senior year of high school All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2015 Matthew Inman. Please don't steal. TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2015 Matthew Inman. TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP This Awesome Urn Will Turn You into a Tree After You Die | Design for Good You don't find many designers working in the funeral business thinking about more creative ways for you to leave this world (and maybe they should be). However, the product designer Gerard Moline has combined the romantic notion of life after death with an eco solution to the dirty business of the actual, you know, transition. His Bios Urn is a biodegradable urn made from coconut shell, compacted peat and cellulose and inside it contains the seed of a tree. Once your remains have been placed into the urn, it can be planted and then the seed germinates and begins to grow. I, personally, would much rather leave behind a tree than a tombstone. Editor's Note: The Bios Urn is a patented design of Estudimoline, the design company of Gerard Moline, a Catalan artist and product designer who designed Bio Urn for animals in 1999.
20 Absolutely Funny eCards Written By Sarah January 5th, 2012 eCards have become another way for people to disconnect from the personal experiences of shopping for a card, writing a nice note and mailing it off to a loved one. With the invention of the eCard breed up a new and clever way to use them, to creative memes. About Sarah Creative content director for SocialHype, LLC. Romantic Day And Evening Ideas We live in a day and age where lives are busy and schedules are swamped. The working day is also a little more versatile than it has been in days past, and people are working longer hours or irregular shifts. This can put a damper on your love life, but this should not discourage you from enjoying you and your partner no matter what time of day it is. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46. 47. 48. 49. 50.