Timothy McSweeney's Internet Tendency: Global War On Bedbugs: Letters from Bedbug City. George Orwell had bedbugs. Down and Out in Paris and London opens with the owner of a hotel in Paris hollering a reminder at one of her patrons not to squash bedbugs against the wallpaper. They bothered him all over Paris. He eventually stumbled upon a remedy, though not before going hungry one night after knocking a bug into a half a liter of milk on which he had spent his last eighty centimes. One of his friends recommended sprinkling black pepper all over his sheets. Pepper didn’t kill them, but it kept them off his bed. Chekhov also had bedbugs. Bob Slocum, the narrator of Joseph Heller’s Something Happened, has “visions these days when I am lying alone in strange beds in hotels or motels, trying to put myself to sleep, of being assailed by filthy hordes of stinging fleas or bedbugs against which I am utterly inept because I am too squeamish to endure them and have no other place to go.” Maureen came to New York in December, and we went to Atlantic City for a couple days. A.O.
10 Things 90s Kids Will Have To Explain To Their Children While most things we experienced as tots in that headiest of eras seems pretty self-explanatory (plaid was everywhere, Leonardo DiCaprio was the molten ball of light around which the solar system turned, and there was no color too bright for your sweatpants) there are some things that will be a bit harder to explain. Here, a primer for when your future children want to know what the hell you were doing with your boxy, multicolored electronics. 1. Topanga was at some point in human history considered not only a legitimate first name for a human being, but the kind of name that would inspire in malleable teenage boys a life-long infatuation. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. Tagged *NSYNC, 90s Porn, Avatar, Backstreet Boys, Beanie babies, Culture & Art, Fern Gully, James Cameron, Justin Timberlake, Lisa Frank, nostalgia, Spice Girls, Tomagotchi, Uncategorized
Hold Close by =IngridTan on deviantART A friend watches movies with you. A GOOD friend helps you count the bodies. Not Always Right: The Book Dear Readers, We are proud to announce Not Always Right’s first-ever book: Not Always Right: Hilarious and Horrific Tales of Customers Gone Wrong. About the book: The book is over 250 pages long (U.S.: $12.99; Canada: $15.99) and includes the best and funniest stories from our website. As a bonus for our loyal readers, we’ve included over 50% brand new, never-before-seen stories. Measuring 5″x7″, Not Always Right is easy to carry around, whether it be a bag, backpack, purse, or briefcase. Who’s it for? Whether it’s for coworkers, friends, or family, Not Always Right is an excellent gift for anyone who needs to know they are not alone when it comes to dealing with customers and clients. You can order your copy today at any of the following retailers:AmazonBarnes & NobleBorders Note: We haven’t seen the book in stores yet, but our publisher tells us that they should be available at brick & mortar locations by early November. Psst! Spread the word! Front Cover (428×600) | Back Cover (428×600)
McSweeney's Internet Tendency: Thirteen Writing Prompts. [Originally published May 4, 2006.] Write a scene showing a man and a woman arguing over the man’s friendship with a former girlfriend. Do not mention the girlfriend, the man, the woman, or the argument. Write a short scene set at a lake, with trees and shit. Choose your favorite historical figure and imagine if he/she had been led to greatness by the promptings of an invisible imp living behind his or her right ear. Write a story that ends with the following sentence: Debra brushed the sand from her blouse, took a last, wistful look at the now putrefying horse, and stepped into the hot-air balloon. A wasp called the tarantula hawk reproduces by paralyzing tarantulas and laying its eggs into their bodies. Imagine if your favorite character from 19th-century fiction had been born without thumbs. Write a story that begins with a man throwing handfuls of $100 bills from a speeding car, and ends with a young girl urinating into a tin bucket.
Derailing for Dummies why americans should never be allowed to travel I had someone ask for an aisle seats so that his or her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?" I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. A nice lady just called. A woman called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know who's luggage belongs to who?" I just got off the phone with a man who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?" A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one of those computer planes." A businessman called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China.
Anne Rice FAQ Whoo, tough one here. This is a question, as you can imagine, that leads into some dangerous waters. Let's start with age: While there is nothing in the text which specifically states Armand's age when Marius saves him we do know that he's forever trapped in the body of a 17 year old. Text in TVA suggests that Marius knew Armand for 2 years before turning him, which would place him at age 15 when the two of them first met. However, text in TVA also suggests that Armand only just entered puberty when under Marius's care which would make him either a late bloomer or a much younger 11-13. It is canon that the two of them were lovers when Armand was still mortal. So it can now be said that at the very least Marius took an at least 15 year old Armand for his lover. Does this make him a pedophile? What's the verdict, then? I'll let her words speak for themselves (this was taken from the message on her phone line, the number of which was listed earlier): "Good morning everybody.
Crunch - Dave's Demolition Service! See more great video on the multimedia page! Video of my car running over stuff! Any requests? Gingerbread House! See Crunch Archive for more great crunches! [Home] - [Site Map] - [Donate] - [Car Shows] - [Multimedia] - [Photos] - [Links] - [Contact] Copyright© 2003 StillRuns.com Why Nikola Tesla was the greatest geek who ever lived Additional notes from the author: If you want to learn more about Tesla, I highly recommend reading Tesla: Man Out of Time Also, this Badass of the week by Ben Thompson is what originally inspired me to write a comic about Tesla. Ben's also got a book out which is packed full of awesome. There's an old movie from the 80s on Netflix Instant Queue right now about Tesla: The Secret of Nikola Tesla. It's corny and full of bad acting, but it paints a fairly accurate depiction of his life. The drunk history of Tesla is quite awesome, too. History.com has a great article about Edison and how his douchebaggery had a chokehold on American cinema.
“Stuff No One Told Me” fun illustrations » This Blog Rules | Why There are several things in life that you already know and have learned but you seem to forget it because no one tells and reminds you of them. Illustrator Alex from Barcelona has introduced these type of statements by making cute and funny illustrations. You will probably agree with a lot of them. Speaking of illustrations, another artist has used them to try to express how “the perfect world” could be. An illustration is a displayed visualization form presented as a drawing, painting, photograph or other work of art that is created to elucidate or dictate sensual information (such as a story, poem or newspaper article) by providing a visual representation graphically. Euphorie: Lena Meyer-Landrut soll auf Horst Köhler folgen - Nach Artikel per E-Mail empfehlen Lena Meyer-Landrut soll auf Horst Köhler folgen Wahnsinn: Nach dem Sieg beim Eurovision Song Contest warten ganz neue Aufgaben auf Hoffnungsträgerin Lena Meyer-Landrut. Wahnsinn: Nach dem Sieg beim Eurovision Song Contest warten ganz neue Aufgaben auf Hoffnungsträgerin Lena Meyer-Landrut. Von Jean Gnatzig Deutschland im Freudentaumel: Zum ersten Mal seit 1982 ist das Land Sieger beim Eurovision Song Contest. Ein phänomenaler Erfolg, den in dieser Konsequenz keiner erwartet hätte: Seitdem Lena Meyer-Landrut den Eurovision Song Contest gewonnen hat, scheint in Deutschland das erste Mal seit Winterbeginn wieder die Sonne, das Oder-Hochwasser ist vorerst gestoppt und Roland Koch bleibt bei seinem Vorhaben, dass er zurücktreten will. Lenas Vorbild macht Schule Kein Wunder, dass Lenas Vorbild Schule macht. Glücklicherweise reagiert man in Lenas Heimat ansonsten völlig unhysterisch auf den Sieg der Hannoveranerin.
Operating Systems Tech Support: "May I ask what operating system you are running today?"Customer: "A computer." A girl walked into the computer center where I work. She said she was having problems with her Mac. I asked what kind of Mac she had. In an indignant voice, she replied, "Duh, Intosh." Tech Support: "What operating system are you running? After conferring with her husband, it turned out she owned a Macintosh with System 8.1. Tech Support: "What version of Windows are you running?" A kid in my class joined a conversation I was having about older computers. Him: "I have the oldest Windows ever at my house. Tech Support: "What operating system do you run?" Tech Support: "Do you know what operating system you're on?" Customer: "I don't use DOS. One time I had to walk a Windows 95 user through a particular procedure. Me: "First you need to open DOS-prompt. My Friend: "I just installed Windows 98." My Friend: "What's your operating system?" Friend: "I heard about this thing called 'Linux'." I went pale.