background preloader

Thoughtcatalog

Thoughtcatalog
I have a secret game that I play in every conversation I have. Until now, no one knew about it… but I’m about to dish the deets. ;) I try to get every person I interact with to say, Wow. That’s a great question… at least once in our conversation. To win at this game, I have to stay super present and plugged in to who I’m chatting with so I can artfully select a question that pushes them to lean into an area of their brain they don’t normally hang out in. It’s fascinating watching them dig deeper into who they are. Why do I play this silly game? Because I believe it’s our responsibility to discover something awesome every person we meet. I thought it would be fun (and hopefully valuable) to give you a sneak peak at some of my favorites to ask (especially on first dates or with partners). My hope is that you too can tuck this list in your back pocket and together we can rid this planet of all the effortless and boring questions people ask each other these days. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9.

100 Getting to Know You Questions Working with a group of new people and need some conversation starters? Break the ice and get to know people better by selecting several of these get-to-know-you questions. Who is your hero? If you could live anywhere, where would it be? What is your biggest fear? What is your favorite family vacation? Party Time! 26. Plan you family meal, office potluck, team party and more. 51. Group Fundraising has never been easier! 76. 90. If you really want to get to know someone, questions (not all at once, of course!) Janis Meredith writes Jbmthinks, a blog on sports parenting and youth sports. Posted by Janis Meredith Posted by Punit Gupta on Thu Feb 19, 2015 2:06 AM EST Great Posted by Anna Nelson on Sun Jan 4, 2015 4:51 PM EST HAHA thanks i needed this for a activity!!!!! Posted by Graham Rogers on Tue Dec 30, 2014 4:12 PM EST What about: If you were on a deserted island what 3 things would you take? Posted by Juggling For A Cure on Tue Dec 30, 2014 7:10 AM EST Thanks for introducing me to myself. :)

Online Dating Checklist Lately I’ve been thinking about my online dating guide, particularly how it continues to grow and how all the information might be overwhelming to someone new to online dating. With that in mind, I’ve put together the following checklist that provides dating suggestions at a very high level based on the advice I provide in my dating guide. Where my guide goes into great detail into each area, this list keeps things simple for quick review. This list is broken down into the major areas of online date: beginning dating online, creating your online dating profile, the communication process, meeting and your first date and, finally, continuing dating online. Each of these sections contains information on how you should approach that phase of online dating. Section 1: As You Begin 1. 2. 3. Section 2: Your Dating Profile 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. Section 3: Communicating 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. Section 4: The First Date 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. Section 5: Continuing to Date Online 26. 27.

Online Dating Guide About the Free Online Dating Guide Download my free eBook, The Online Dating Guide, and find out exactly how I found success using online dating. Stop feeling frustrated! Learn what works and apply it to your own dating life. Online dating can be confusing and frustrating…trust me, I know. In my last few months of online dating, I was going on many first dates every week. Learn more about my experience dating online >> What’s Included My Dating Guide? Stop The Heartbreak Cycle: 7 Dos and Don’ts For Handling a Break-Up “When something bad happens you have three choices. You can let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.” ~Unknown I’ve learned to be thankful for my first heartbreak. Of course, at the time of the crime I struggled to see anything positive in it. It was literally as if someone stabbed my heart; there was a problem that caused my body to stop working properly. In fact, I still think of him occasionally; it’s so hard to turn off. Like during any trauma your body faces, it tries to repair itself so it can be whole again. I became emotionally promiscuous. Normally my standards are that I date just one person at a time and don’t get intimate with anyone until I’m in a relationship. But now that my heart was hurt, all those rules were thrown out the window. I dated guys just to date someone. I wanted to display the image that I was fine, happy, healthy, and so over the perpetrator. Pretty soon he asked me to be his girlfriend. But I never did. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7.

A List of 100 Questions to Ask Your Partner on Date Nights Date nights for established couples can feel boring and stale if you talk about the same old topics all the time. Talking about work, the kids, or household repairs should not be the primary focus of nights when you’re trying to reconnect as a couple. So, here is a list of 100 — yes, 100 — questions that you can choose from to ask each other on your next dinner out. Use only two to three questions per date night, and really talk about the answers in depth. What is your favorite memory of dating me? Whew! Featured photo credit: Dinner Date via pulsd.com 7 Types of Women to Stay Away From. *Author’s Note: This is a response to an article written by Dina Strada, 7 Types of Men to Stay Away From. It seems like Dina wrote it from her heart, and based on the reactions I read on Facebook, many women agree with her. I have imitated her style and form in an effort to show another perspective, my perspective—a man’s perspective. As men, it’s too easy to assume women are what we see on the outside. Drawn in by her looks, a smile, we are quick to let our guard down and minimize any negative qualities. We can usually explain why we fall. It’s not surprising, then, that many men fall for the same types of woman over and over again, even it if always turns out the same way. Complete f*cking bullsh*t. If you stop and take an outsider’s look at your current relationship, you may realize you are in this pattern right now. Everyone can change, though, and who knows, maybe this time it will turn out differently. 1. This girl is just a few short qualities away from perfect. Stop now! 2. 3. 4.

50 Things Men Wish Women Knew I just came across this article and thought it would be great for all of us ladies on here. I know my single friends and I always question what guys really want and this gives us a little more insight into that. Not to mention it's some great advice from men about what they wish we ladies knew/understood about them. What He Wishes You Knew #1 Express yourself. What He Wishes You Knew #2 You look hot in running shoes and shorts. What He Wishes You Knew #3 Bare, tan shoulders are underrated. What He Wishes You Knew #4 If you think I'm speeding now, you should see me drive when you're not in the car. What He Wishes You Knew #5 If you're truly interested in us, don't play hard to get. What He Wishes You Knew #6 Shopping is a chore, not an activity. What He Wishes You Knew #7 When I screw up, go ahead and tell me—once. What He Wishes You Knew #8 No question need ever be asked through a closed bathroom door if I'm inside. What He Wishes You Knew #9 What He Wishes You Knew #10 My guy friends.

Fairy Tales Can Come True Here's a "photo story" based on the book, Fairy Tales Can Come True (Just Not Every Day!), published by Shake It! Books. Falling in love is the easy part. "This relationship stuff. Try to change your attitude a bit. "Okay, I'm taking notes!" Tip #1 Make a list. "Hmmm... Pretty soon, you'll find yourself thinking... "Say, he's not so bad after all!" And making that list goes for both of you —to help you both remember the good. "That's what we do. Click to continue How to Be a Better Conversationalist Being able to hold good conversation is the foundation of every social interaction. Without this ability, getting past small talk and building stronger connections is damn near impossible. We talk to people every single day yet we get nervous and struggle during the moments that matter most. I’ve always been decent at riffing with people I already knew or was introduced to in a casual setting, like school or parties. Stay in the conversation Get out of your own head and into the conversation. If you’re thinking about what to say next you’re not involved enough. Make statements Asking questions are great for getting to know someone, when used wisely. Statements are much more comforting and natural. Rephrase your questions as statements. Use hook points Have no idea what to say next? Let’s use the example above, “You’re definitely from Boston.” Now, you can take one of those points and relate back to them. Ask questions you care about As I said, you want to use your questions wisely.

How to Choose the Right Person For You When you’re looking to build a healthy relationship, how do you make sure someone is right for you? For a long time, I had no idea. So I asked other people what they looked for in a partner, and I got answers like… “A sense of humor, attractiveness, intelligence, creativity, sexual compatibility, passion, an active lifestyle, a stable career.” I knew those qualities were important. After a breakup, I asked a former boss who had been happily married for over 20 years for advice. “Do they respect you?” This simple guideline has profoundly changed the relationships in my life. Once you like someone, respect is the first thing you should be screening for. None of the other qualities will matter if you aren’t treated well. By prioritizing your self-respect you immediately: Avoid wasting time on unfulfilling relationships that make you feel miserable.Spend time being happy and building healthy relationships with good people.Reinforce your self-worth. Want to build healthy relationships with women?

9 Good Signs You’re in the Right Relationship It’s not always where you are in life, but who you have by your side that matters. “How do I know if I’m in the right relationship or not?” This is one of the most common questions our coaching clients ask us. And after Angel and I listen to the specifics of their situation, we often toss a question back at them to further clarify their thoughts and expectations. “What do you think a “right relationship” should provide for the people in it?” Although the answer here is obviously subjective, in all relationships, romantic and platonic alike, there are some clear signs that things are going well. Enter your email to get new articles like this delivered for free. Join 130,000+ subscribers and get life-changing ideas in your inbox. Thanks! 1. Far too often, we make our relationships harder than they have to be. And of course, if you feel like someone is playing games with you, speak up. 2. 3. You can’t be afraid to have certain conversations. 4. 5. 6. So open yourself up. 7. 8. 9. Related

5 Ways to Stop Feeling Insecure in Your Relationships When I was younger I often felt inadequate and “not good enough” to be friends, lovers, or business partners with certain people. Sometimes I simply couldn’t understand what others saw in me. I was very insecure. I ended many promising relationships because of my insecurity. So what did I do, and what can you do if insecurity is damaging your relationships? You need to understand that a good relationship is about sharing ideas and enjoyable moments with another, to help each other grow in healthy ways, both together socially and as individuals. 1. Most relationship problems and associated social anxieties start with bad communication, which in turn leads to attempted mind reading. If someone says one thing, don’t assume they mean something else. It’s also important to remember that you aren’t suppose to know every little thing going on in the minds of others, even the people closest to you. 2. 3. 4. Inventing problems in our mind and then believing them is a clear path to self-sabotage.

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Gain the Advantage in Social Situations Social situations are among the most important in our lives. Yet, there is a huge chance that you are oblivious to the plethora of unwritten social rules that structure everybody’s behaviour. Failing to comply to these cultural imprints can cause irreversible damage. Just following them blindly will not get you ahead. Hacking them, however, will give you the best results possible. 1) Assume comfort in any interaction. Our brain is an incredibly complicated instrument. In most of our social interactions, we find it difficult to feel comfortable among strangers because our brain tries to protect us from exposure. This however isn’t helping us when trying to be social and meet new people, is it? This is why assuming comfort is so powerful. 2) Pay attention to people’s feet when you are approaching them. Interrupting people when they are in the middle of an important conversation is one of the most annoying things to do. If they turn both torso and feet, it means you are welcome. Admit it.

A Quick Guide to Gaining Confidence When You Socialize By Leo Babauta I’m a shy person by nature, not a natural extrovert and definitely not comfortable in large groups of people. So if you’re like me at all, then this guide is for you. I’ve had to learn to be more confident in social situations, and it hasn’t exactly been easy. But some things I’ve learned how to do over the years: Introduce myself to new people and quickly find common ground.Be semi-comfortable in a party where I don’t know most of the people.Be myself, or some version of that, rather than trying to impress people.Speak in front of a crowd of strangers (not comfortably, but I do OK).Talk comfortably one-on-one or in a small group, and not worry too much about whether people will like me.Make fairly authentic friendships with just a handful of deeper conversations. On Relationships First, we should quickly answer the question: why even bother? Because relationships matter. So it’s worth the effort. On Practice But how can you practice if you don’t have the confidence yet?

Related: