Two days ago I went to the zoo and saw two chimps 69ing a foot away from me A.S.B. & Who doesnt like a blonde joke? A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. She says she’s going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000. The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Rolls Royce. The car is parked on the street in front of the bank; she has the title, and everything checks out. The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. The bank’s president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a $250,000 Rolls as collateral against a $5,000 loan.
not an insult How To Be A Successful Evil Overlord How to be a Successful Evil Overlord by Peter Anspach Being an Evil Overlord seems to be a good career choice. It pays well, there are all sorts of perks and you can set your own hours. The Top 100 Things I'd Do If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord My Legions of Terror will have helmets with clear Plexiglas visors, not face concealing ones. Sitting in a hospital room waiting for my father to die (we took him off life support yesterday). I could sure use a good joke, Reddit... : AskReddit Application for a night out - hisnhers Funny Shit Funny Shit (home) → genderwar → Application for a night out - his'n'hers Application for a night out - his'n'hers → Check out more Funny Shit More: The Gender War Teefury make awesome shirts, you should check them out! Copyright/Disclaimer/Privacy
My World and Welcome... Funny Pages: Handy Latin Phrases Non calor sed umor est qui nobis incommodat. It's not the heat, it's the humidity. Di! Ecce hora! Uxor mea me necabit! Estne volumen in toga, an solum tibi libet me videre? Lex clavatoris designati rescindenda est. Sentio aliquos togatos contra me conspirare. Caesar si viveret, ad remum dareris. Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari? (At a barbeque) Animadvertistine, ubicumque stes, fumum recta in faciem ferri? Sona si Latine loqueris. Si Hoc Legere Scis Nimium Eruditionis Habes If you can read this you're over-educated Vidi Vici Veni I saw, I conquered, I came Vacca foeda Stupid cow Mihi ignosce. Raptus regaliter Royally screwed Si hoc signum legere potes, operis boni in rebus Latinus alacribus et fructuosis potiri potes! Gramen artificiosum odi. Nihil curo de ista tua stulta superstitione. Noli me vocare, ego te vocabo. Nullo metro compositum est. Non curo. Fac ut gaudeam. Visne saltare? Re vera, potas bene. O!
I think my girlfriend ACTUALLY expects me to do this at a bar.. The Meaning of Life by Cliff Pickover The differences between men and women. This is my lastest book: The Book of Black: Black Holes, Black Death, Black Forest Cake, and Other Dark Sides of Life Easily read my latest tweets, for free, here. Return to Pickover's main web page. There it goes.. Thanksgiving as a kid VS Thanksgiving as an adult - The Oatmeal - StumbleUpon All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2014 Matthew Inman. Please don't steal. TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2014 Matthew Inman. Please don't steal. TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP 6 Life-Changing Uses for Binder Clips (That You Couldve Easily Thought Of)... Yes, it may seem like an ordinary binder clip. And it is. Make no mistake -- it will keep your papers organized with the best of them. The BEST. But it's so much more. 1. (via) 2. (via) 3. iPod Dock Just go to your local Apple Store, pretend like you're interested in all the MacBook Airs, and walk right out. (via) 4. (via) 5. (via) 6. (via)
The 5 types of programmers & Steven Benner's Blog In my code journeys and programming adventures I’ve encountered many strange foes, and even stranger allies. I’ve identified at least five different kinds of code warriors, some make for wonderful comrades in arms, while others seem to foil my every plan. However they all have their place in the pantheon of software development. Without a healthy mix of these different programming styles you’ll probably find your projects either take too long to complete, are not stable enough or are too perfect for humans to look upon. The duct tape programmer The code may not be pretty, but damnit, it works! This guy is the foundation of your company. The OCD perfectionist programmer You want to do what to my code? This guy doesn’t care about your deadlines or budgets, those are insignificant when compared to the art form that is programming. The anti-programming programmer I’m a programmer, damnit. His world has one simple truth; writing code is bad. The half-assed programmer What do you want?