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Not all men: How discussing women’s issues gets derailed.

Not all men: How discussing women’s issues gets derailed.
Photo by Shutterstock / ollyy The following article is a discussion about violence, violence against women, and the oppression women face every day. Have a care if these topics disturb you. Note too: I am a cisgender male, and the hashtags I discuss below deal with the issues in binary men/women terms, so I do as well. Trans and other folks may well have very different feelings about these issues, and I welcome their input. On Friday, May 23, 2014, a man killed six people (and possibly himself). The murderer was active on men’s rights fora, where women are highly objectified, to say the very least. Phil Plait writes Slate’s Bad Astronomy blog and is an astronomer, public speaker, science evangelizer, and author of Death From the Skies! Of course, these loathsome people represent a very small percentage of men out there. Why is it not helpful to say “not all men are like that”? Second, it’s defensive. Third, the people saying it aren’t furthering the conversation, they’re sidetracking it.

http://www.slate.com/blogs/bad_astronomy/2014/05/27/not_all_men_how_discussing_women_s_issues_gets_derailed.html

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Standing up for men Chicago Tribune 7/10/14 ST. CLAIR SHORES, Mich. — The feminists hadn’t shown up yet, but they could, at any moment, with their protest signs and screaming. The threat of them was an infuriating and exhilarating specter throughout the weekend, a symbol of the oppression facing the men’s rights activists who had gathered last month to meet for their inaugural conference. Early Friday before the opening session, a wispy trail of men — mostly white, college-through-retirement-age — waited for the doors to open outside of this Veterans of Foreign Wars outpost in suburban Detroit.

#YesAllWomen in the wake of Elliot Rodger: Why it’s so hard for men to recognize misogyny. Photo by LDprod/Shutterstock When Santa Barbara police arrived at Elliot Rodger’s apartment last month—after Rodger’s mother alerted authorities to her son’s YouTube videos, where he expressed his resentment of women who don’t have sex with him, aired his jealousy of the men they do choose, and stated his intentions to remedy this “injustice” through a display of his own “magnificence and power”—they left with the impression that he was a “perfectly polite, kind and wonderful human.” Then Rodger killed six people and himself on Friday night, leaving a manifesto that spelled out his virulent hatred for women in more explicit terms, and Santa Barbara County Sheriff Bill Brown deemed him a “madman.” More on Slate Plus Another rude awakening played out on social media this weekend as news of Rodger’s attack spread around the world. But there are other, more insidious hurdles that prevent male bystanders from helping to fight violence against women.

Why I Quit My College Fraternity Jeanne always felt comfortable with her "number." But it wasn't until she started telling people how many men she'd slept with that she began to feel self-conscious about her sexuality. "I've had guys say, 'Are you kidding? I don't want to be involved with you anymore,' or, 'That's disgusting. How could you?' MISANDRY artxygrunge asked: as a feminist who believes in equality you are a fucking abortion to society. i would LOVE to push you down a flight of stairs you cunty, uncultured fuck stick. feminism isn't about degrading men to push women to the top, it's about equality you fucking elitist dipshit. kys lmao. 76 notes Tags: misandrist answers artxygrunge Anonymous asked: i was venting to my grandma about how sucky men are & she was like i'm gonna let you in on a secret: men are assholes, no matter how far back you go. they always have been. don't marry an old white man. be a lesbian.

101 Everyday Ways for Men to Be Allies to Women I’ve considered myself a feminist and male ally to women for quite some time. When I took my first Women’s Studies class two years ago with Professor Denise Witzig, little did I know that it would take me down an unsuspecting, beautiful, and transformative path towards feminism. Below, I’ve complied a list of 101 everyday ways for men to be allies to women. I must acknowledge that this post was written with cisgender, heterosexual men as a possible, target audience due to the lack of support from this group. However, I feel that many of these points are applicable on a broader scale. If you have suggestions or additions to this list, I’ve included my email at the end of this post.

“Trophy Scarves”: Race, Gender, and the Woman-as-Prop Trope (NSFW) At the end of last year, Robin Thicke took a lot of heat for both the lyrics of his song, Blurred Lines, and the accompanying video. The latter is a transparent instance of a very common strategy for making men look cool: surround them with beautiful and preferably naked women. It seems especially effective if the men in question act unimpressed and unaffected by, or even disinterested in, the women around them. It’s as if they are trying to say, “I am so accustomed to having access to beautiful, naked women, I don’t even notice that they’re there anymore.”

Feminism shouldn’t make men comfortable Emma Watson’s speech on gender equality at the UN got a lot of attention, and that’s great. The more that hop the feminism train and use their platforms to spread the message, the merrier. But there’s a tiny little thing I’d like to disagree with her about. The thrust of the speech is about getting men on board with the mission of gender equality. Watson said: “How can we affect change in the world when only half of it is invited or feel welcome to participate in the conversation? Men—I would like to take this opportunity to extend your formal invitation. Op-Ed: Feminism and the PIC: Why “Add-Incarceration-and-Stir” Doesn’t Cut It By Jeanne Flavin and Laura Huss Many mainstream feminist and prochoice groups have been reluctant to adopt intersectional approaches and to declare common cause with other progressive movements. Yet the advent of mass incarceration and the prison industrial complex (PIC) makes clear that securing women’s reproductive health and rights requires our full-on and intersectional engagement. We must reject an “add prisons and stir” approach to advocacy in favor of making dismantling mass incarceration and other systems of institutional discrimination central to our efforts. And there is no better time than the present: if the War on Drugs and the 600% increase in incarceration of women between 1980 and 2000 wasn’t enough to propel feminist organizations into action, perhaps the introduction of laws that allow the incarceration of women because they are pregnant will. Consider Amanda Kimbrough, who lived in northwestern Alabama with her family, including two young daughters.

EEOC Announces Tougher Rules Protecting Pregnant Workers hide captionThe Equal Employment Opportunity Commission's new guidance states that employers who allow parental leave must provide it to men and women equally. Yuri Arcurs/iStockphoto The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission's new guidance states that employers who allow parental leave must provide it to men and women equally. Discrimination against female workers who might get pregnant in the future, or have been pregnant in the past, is against the law, the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission said this week. Gender-Neutral Bathrooms Are Quietly Becoming The New Thing At Colleges A popular student center at Northwestern University is the latest college campus facility to embrace gender-neutral bathrooms. New to campus this fall will be a pair of such restrooms -- sometimes called "all-gender" restrooms -- at the school's Norris University Center. "These are two gender-open bathrooms where students of any gender can go in, and use the restroom, and feel safe, regardless of gender expression or gender identity," Michelle Margulis, president of NU's Rainbow Alliance LGBT student group told CBS Chicago. The number of gender-neutral bathrooms has grown in just the past few years, in city-run facilities, workplaces and, most commonly, college campuses. There are more than 150 schools across the U.S. that have gender-neutral bathrooms, according to the University of Massachusetts Amherst's LGBTQ organization The Stonewall Center.

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