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Homer Simpson Quotes

Homer Simpson Quotes
D'oh! I hate Traffic. The band AND the phenomenon! Oh, why do my actions have consequences? I love going to aquatic parks. Sure, they have worse rides than amusement parks, less fish than aquariums, but the parking is ample! Thank goodness it's TGIF! Marge, I thought this was an inocuous lunch, but it's become terribly ocuous! When will I learn? Bingo! Ah, alcohol. What's the point of going out? Lisa, vampires are make believe, like elves, gremlins, and Eskimos. Save me, Jeebus! Facts are meaningless - you could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true! I'm not impressed easily. Well, crying isn't gonna bring him back, unless your tears smell like dog food. I don't hate your mother, I just won't be sad when she dies. How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Who are you? Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You/re making a scene'. I'm a 'Spalding Gray' in a 'Rick Dees' world. Donuts...is there anything they can't do? Because they're stupid, that's why.

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The Flip Ship The FLIP Research Vessel (FLoating Instrument Platform) is the only ship in the world with the ability to flip from a horizontal to vertical position while at sea (at least on purpose). Built to study wave height, acoustical signals, water temperature, and density, the ship is 108 meters long and weighs 700 tons. Although it looks like a normal ship while is it en route to a location, upon arriving the front of the ship is flooded with water causing the back end to go horizontal. The procedure takes about 30 minutes, during which the crew must literally walk up the wall to remain standing. The ship contains a galley, crew quarters, and even bathrooms that work in both positions. Best One-Liners and Zingers The HyperTexts The Best One-Liners and Zingers compiled and edited by Michael R. Burch

ERUDITE CONCEPTS If you're not familiar with the work of Boswell D. Rabbitsmith, he's the famous erudite scientist who once said: "I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates." His mind sees things differently than most of us do, to our amazement and amusement. Here are some of his gems: (He also makes his living as a comedian by the name of Steve Wright....) Error Message Generator romanesque-partner agitato-retired Visit the Gallery of Errors or create your own error message here Copy this link to send this page to a friend: Do not link directly to the image! No Hot-Linking! Your link will not work!

Math Jokes at WorkJoke.com - Profession Jokes How they prove that all odd integers higher than 2 are prime? There are three kinds of mathematicians:those who can count and those who can't. There are two groups of people in the world;those who believe that the world can bedivided into two groups of people,and those who don't. There are two groups of people in the world:Those who can be categorized into one of twogroups of people, and those who can't.

ELEPHANT JOKES Comment or Share Your Own Joke! Email this page to a friend Home | Parents | Links | Games | Send us a JokeAnimal Jokes | Boy/Girl Jokes | Doctor, Doctor | Holiday Jokes Internet Jokes | Knock Knock Jokes | Monster Tales | RiddlesScary Jokes | School Jokes | Silly Jokes | Sports Jokes |Even More Jokes ! www.cs.columbia.edu/sip/sipit/funeral.txt Dear friends, It is with the saddest heart that I pass on the following. Please join me in remembering a great icon. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly-greased coffin. Haiku Writer by TriviaPark.com (17-syllable chunks of exquisite beauty from a bottomless well of bits.) From 36 Views of Mt. Fuji by Katsushika Hokusai (1760-1849)Thanks to Adachi-Hanga Pine hard and wilful,Lingering by the egret;Weary, wild egret. Live, walk. With pink skiesLinger, accept.

Chemistry Jokes - Chemistry Jokes Riddles One Liners Humor Chemistry is funny and chemists have a great sense of humor! Do you have a chemistry joke or riddle or are you looking for one? Share your chemistry joke or read jokes submitted by other readers. Share Your Chemistry Joke Cobalt Why was cobalt hired for the orchestra? My World and Welcome... Funny Pages: Handy Latin Phrases Non calor sed umor est qui nobis incommodat. It's not the heat, it's the humidity. Di! Ecce hora! Uxor mea me necabit! God, look at the time!

Chemistry Jokes and Riddles - Humor for Chemists Every chemist deserves a break. So put down that beaker, take off your safety glasses, and enjoy a few chemistry jokes and riddles. And the next time you need an inorganic standard, be sure to think of Inorganic Ventures. Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium? How did it go? It went OK2!

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