» The Habit Change Cheatsheet: 29 Ways to Successfully Ingrain a Behavior We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit. – Aristotle Our daily lives are often a series of habits played out through the day, a trammeled existence fettered by the slow accretion of our previous actions. By Leo Babauta But habits can be changed, as difficult as that may seem sometimes. I’m a living example: in tiny, almost infinitesimal steps, I’ve changed a laundry list of habits. It’s possible. And while I’ve written about habit change many times over the course of the life of Zen Habits, today I thought I’d put the best tips all together in one cheatsheet, for those new to the blog and for those who could use the reminders. Keep it simple Habit change is not that complicated. The simple steps of habit change: 1. 2. 3. That’s it. The Habit Change Cheatsheet The following is a compilation of tips to help you change a habit. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29.
Body Language Interesting Info -> Lying Index -> How to Detect Lies Become a Human Lie Detector (Part 1) Warning: sometimes ignorance is bliss. After gaining this knowledge, you may be hurt when it is obvious that someone is lying to you. The following deception detection techniques are used by police, forensic psychologists, security experts and other investigators. Introduction to Detecting Lies: This knowledge is also useful for managers, employers, and for anyone to use in everyday situations where telling the truth from a lie can help prevent you from being a victim of fraud/scams and other deceptions. This is just a basic run down of physical (body language) gestures and verbal cues that may indicate someone is being untruthful. If you got here from somewhere else, be sure to check out our Lie Detection index page for more info including new research in the field of forensic psychology. Signs of Deception: Body Language of Lies: • A person who is lying to you will avoid making eye contact. Bored?
The Secret to Not Caring What People Think Whether it is becoming plugged into our identity, quitting alcohol or even becoming more confident, our worry of what people think can really affect us. From the jobs we choose, to the people we date and the risks we take, we often limit our actions through fear of criticism or judgment from others. This is a serious issue, and a problem many people experience, therefore I’ve taken my personal experience and the advice of others to reveal the secrets to not caring what people think. Why we Care what people Think First of all, I want to say that sometimes caring what people think is not a bad idea; the part of our mind that produces this fear is often in place to protect us. I’ve spent months trying to understand why we care what people think, and as (surprisingly) usual, the answer is relatively simple and the heart of what this website is about. What people say about you is none of your business- Sean Stephenson Of course, your identity is not what people think of you, it is just…you. 1.
5 Ways to Change Someone's Mind An expert recently claimed that knowing--and using-- a few simple rules can help you change the minds of other people. The first rule of changing minds is to keep your message short, sharp, and simple. People tend to respond less well to long convoluted arguments, according to Kevin Dutton, Ph.D., author of Dutton's book isn't itself a short or oversimplified how-to book. The crux of Dutton's message is contained in his five elements, made easy to remember with the acronym . IMPLICITY: Keep your message short, sharp, and simple to convince people it's true. ERCEIVED SELF-INTEREST: Con men agree it's the key to getting us to do something we didn't think we wanted to. NCONGRUITY: Surprise people -- tell them your cupcake is 400 cents rather than four dollars and they're far more likely to buy it. ONFIDENCE: The more confident you are, the more we believe you're right -- even when we know your facts are wrong. As I read , I had a question about good versus evil . Read Kevin Dutton's blog .
11 ways the world could end: Road to destruction Interested in uplifting stories on the natural world, sustainable communities, simple food, and new thinking on how to live well? Please enter a valid email address and try again! No thanks Tackle Any Issue With a List of 100 The List of 100 is a powerful technique you can use to generate ideas, clarify your thoughts, uncover hidden problems or get solutions to any specific questions you’re interested in. The technique is very simple in principle: state your issue or question in the top of a blank sheet of paper and come up with a list of one hundred answers or solutions about it. “100 Ways to Generate Income”, “100 Ways to be More Creative” or “100 Ways to Improve my Relationships” are some examples. “One hundred entries? Bear with me: it’s exactly this exaggeration that makes the technique powerful. When starting your list you may believe that there’s no way to get it done. Unlike the related Idea Quota tool — whose primary goal is to acquire the habit of coming up with ideas — the goal of a List of 100 is to take your mind by surprise. Ground Rules There are only two simple principles to keep in mind when making Lists of 100: 1. This is the one crucial element for the technique to work. 2. 1. 2. 3.
Seven Ways to Say “No” and Keep Good Relations o you have trouble saying “No”? Many women and men are traditionally taught to avoid saying “no”, especially when facing authority figures. Some of us are told from a young age that we’re not supposed to say “no” to our parents , relatives, teachers, bosses, and others. There may be cultural, gender , social, religious , or institutional pressure to conform and please. Of course, it’s important to say “no” when necessary, in order to protect our boundaries and maintain one’s own priorities. For example, if your friend asks to borrow your car, and you’re uncomfortable with the idea, you can either be direct and say “no”, or you can use any of the following, assertive yet diplomatic expressions to draw the line: " be the only one driving my car “ lend out my car.” “ lend out my car.” “ I keep my car for my own use.” “ , I’m not going to be able to lend you my car.” “ letting others drive my car “ I’m not going to let other people drive my car.”
Update the Relationship Learn-in. in Archives Learn-ins Forum Repost ***Warning: These exercises are not to be used by anyone with a history of mental illness, severe trauma, or panic. Those challenges are best handled with a therapist. You are only permitted to use these exercises if you agree to absolve Steve Mensing, the webmasters, Emoclear.com and the web host of any responsibility for the application or misapplication of this process. The following couples exercises are based on Martin Seligman's Positive Psychology approach. (c) Steve Mensing EMOCLEAR POSITVE PSYCHOLOGY COUPLES EXERCISE I: Doing Pleasurable, Important, and Meaningful Activites together. Daily for two weeks do the following: (1) Choose a pleasurable activity to do together and do it to completion. (2) Choose an activity you both deem important or meaningful and do it to completion. (3) Later in the day record what occured in your life during and at the conclusion of the activities. EMOCLEAR POSITIVE PSYCHOLOGY COUPLES EXERCISE II: Building Character. The Activity List: 1. 2. 3.
Perfect Persuasive Messages Craft messages that change minds using these 20 principles of persuasion, all based on established psychological research. Perfection is hard to achieve in any walk of life and persuasion is no different. It relies on many things going just right at the crucial moment; the perfect synchronisation of source, message and audience. But even if perfection is unlikely, we all need to know what to aim for. To bring you the current series on the psychology of persuasion I’ve been reading lots of research, much more than is covered in recent posts. Here are the most important points for crafting the perfect persuasive message, all of which have scientific evidence to back them up. Multiple, strong arguments: the more arguments, the more persuasive, but overall persuasive messages should be balanced, as two-sided arguments fare better than their one-sided equivalents (as long as counter-arguments are shot down).Relevance: persuasive messages should be personally relevant to the audience.
Top 50 Atheism Quotes George Carlin Quotes 1. Religion easily has the best bullshit story of all time. Think about it. 2. 3. Friedrich Nietzsche Quotes 4. 5. 6. Albert Einstein Quotes 7. 8. 9. Gandhi Quotes 10. 11. Mark Twain Quotes 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. Thomas Jefferson Quotes 17. 18. Benjamin Franklin Quotes 19. 20. Voltaire Quotes 21. 22. Stephen Hawking Quotes 23. 24. Jiddu Krishnamurti Quotes 25. 26. Christopher Hitchens Quotes 27. 28. Sigmund Freud Quotes 29. 30. George Bernard Shaw Quotes 31. 32. 32. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46. 47. 48. 49. 50. Incoming search terms:
How To Train Yourself To Be In The Mood You Want Dec 27, 2010 When you have major changes going on in your life, or you’re just frustrated about where you are, it’s easy to get trapped in a cycle of depression, bad moods and frustration. I know, I’ve been there … and when I’m not careful, I still get there more than I want to. But when I’ve had a particularly hard time, I hit these moments where I’m in a foul mood, or I’m just feeling paralyzed, and I’m just stuck. Sometimes I just stew in that and stay there, but sometimes I actually get intelligent and pull my way out of it. I’m going to outline the framework that I’ve been using successfully to really get myself resourceful and motivated (and in a better mood) when I’m feeling stuck. First Up: Using A Framework to Escape From Paralyzing Emotions When we feel bad, it’s hard to “feel good” again. The reason for this is that steps take the emotion out of our situation and give us direction to simply act. A: AGREE With Yourself That You Don’t Want To Be In This Mood Right Now. Dave
The 5 Saddest Things People Do to Look Smart We're at a point in our society where being smart is becoming more and more valued. Hollywood films are featuring smarter heroes, TV shows try to shame people who are dumber than a fifth grader, we elected a smarter president, etc. Unfortunately, every time something becomes cool, a lot of people are in such a hurry to jump on the bandwagon that they focus on the outer trappings and don't put in the work. Via Getty ImagesWhy study when you can just put on some glasses and look at people real serious like? The biggest problem is that there's a lot of different kinds of smart, and we can't all be good at all of them. But pulling these stunts just backfires terribly, like when people try to: Brandish Academic Credentials Now, there's an appropriate time to pull out your Ph.D. or your standardized test scores, like when you are applying for a job or a school, or picking someone up at a bar. Via Getty Images"Hey, do you wash your pants with Windex because I got an 800 on my SAT math section."