GINGERS DO HAVE SOULS!!

Why I Will Never Have a Girlfriend - nothingisreal.com - StumbleUpon Tristan Miller German Research Center for Artificial Intelligence[1] 20 December 1999 Why don't I have a girlfriend? This is a question that practically every male has asked himself at one point or another in his life. Unfortunately, there is rarely a hard and fast answer to the query. Not the author, though. Lest anyone suspect that my standards for women are too high, let me allay those fears by enumerating in advance my three criteria for the match. That said, I now present my demonstration of why the probability of finding a suitable candidate fulfilling the three above-noted requirements is so small as to be practically impossible—in other words, why I will never have a girlfriend. Number of people on Earth (in 1998): 5 592 830 000[4] We start with the largest demographic in which I am interested—namely, the population of this planet. …who are female: 2 941 118 000[5] I'd've thought that, given the title of this essay, this criterion goes without saying. …who are beautiful: 1 487 838