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5 Soviet Space Programs That Prove Russia Was Insane

5 Soviet Space Programs That Prove Russia Was Insane
The thing about the Iron Curtain is that we'll never fully know what crazy shit went on behind it during the Cold War. And that's too bad, because the little hints that leak out really make it look like these people just did not give a shit. Take the Soviet space program. We know they were the first to get both a satellite and a human in orbit, which were both pretty admirable accomplishments. What they kept hidden from the world was that maintaining even minimal levels of safety was a completely foreign concept to them. And that the cosmonauts who flew their rickety ass spaceships must have had balls made of elephant tusks. Here are five spectacularly audacious Soviet space programs that prove that in Soviet Russia, space goes into you. #5. Between 1951 and 1966, the USSR sent over twenty dogs into the cosmos, but to be fair, they weren't the only ones who tested the viability of human space travel by sending animals up first. We're guessing PETA never had a Soviet equivalent. #4. #3. Related:  RussiaSpace

Alexey Leonov Alexey Arkhipovich Leonov (Russian: Алексе́й Архи́пович Лео́нов, IPA: [ɐlʲɪˈksʲej ɐˈrxʲipəvʲɪtɕ lʲɪˈonəf]; born 30 May 1934 in Listvyanka, West Siberian Krai, Soviet Union) is a retired Soviet/Russian cosmonaut and Air Force Major General. On 18 March 1965, he became the first human to conduct extra-vehicular activity (EVA), exiting the capsule during the Voskhod 2 mission for a 12-minute spacewalk. Biography[edit] Alexey Leonov (left, back row) with fellow cosmonauts in 1965 Leonov was one of the 20 Soviet Air Force pilots selected to be part of the first cosmonaut group in 1960. As of November 2011, Leonov is the last survivor of the five cosmonauts in the Voskhod programme. Leonov was to have commanded the next mission to Salyut 1, but this was scrapped after the deaths of the Soyuz 11 crew members, and the space station was lost. Leonov's painting Near the Moon (1967) In 2001, he was a vice president of Moscow-based Alfa-Bank and an adviser to the first deputy of the Board.[3]

Lost Cosmonauts Lost Cosmonauts, or Phantom Cosmonauts, is a conspiracy theory alleging that Soviet cosmonauts entered outer space, but without their existence having been acknowledged by either the Soviet or Russian space authorities. Proponents of the Lost Cosmonauts theory concede that Yuri Gagarin was the first man to survive human spaceflight, but claim that the Soviet Union attempted to launch two or more manned space flights prior to Gagarin's, and that at least two cosmonauts died in the attempts. Another cosmonaut, Vladimir Ilyushin, is believed to have landed off-course and been held by the Chinese government. The evidence cited to support Lost Cosmonaut theories is generally not regarded as conclusive, and several cases have been confirmed as hoaxes. Allegations[edit] Purported Czech information leak[edit] In December 1959, an alleged high-ranking Czech Communist leaked information about many purported unofficial space shots. High-altitude equipment tests[edit] Heinlein[edit]

6 Depraved Sexual Fetishes That Are Older Than You Think Bizarre sexual fetishes are a staple of the human psyche--most everyone has them, and with the arrival of Internet porn, all the walls came crumbling down. Suddenly, everyone everywhere could share their sick, nasty fantasies with the entire world, safe under a veil of anonymity. But the Internet by no means invented these things. As it turns out, they've been around way longer than that stain in your Honda. Tentacle Rape - Late 18th Century We love to mock "tentacle porn," and Japan for inventing it. The modern tentacle rape genre was created by Toshio Maeda, whose manga Urotsukidoji "created what might be called the modern paradigm of tentacle porn," which we suppose in Japan is actually seen as an accomplishment rather than grounds for a sexual assault conviction. Bet they regret that. For men, the fetish appeals to those who enjoy seeing women humiliated and subjugated by something that isn't even human. Autoerotic Asphyxiation - 17th Century "Ghost Boner" was already taken.

8 Famous Movies Made by The Last Person You'd Ever Suspect Almost every successful person working in Hollywood sticks to his or her thing that they like. You would never see, say, David Fincher doing slapstick gross-out comedy, or Michael Bay directing a Jane Austen-type movie (unless, maybe, if the Little Women were also fighter pilots). But sometimes these folks, with their well-defined comfort zones, lend a hand to movies so bizarrely out-of-character for them it's like they only did it to say, "There, I can do other stuff too. It's Pat Was Co-Written by Quentin Tarantino Based on a Saturday Night Live sketch where the audience couldn't tell whether the obnoxious character Pat was a man or a woman, the comedy movie It's Pat tells the story of ... the exact same joke. Getty"What hath SNL wrought?" But it was made by ... Quentin Tarantino. The guy who made Reservoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction and Kill Bill has an ego so massive that according to science, it should have long ago collapsed on itself like a neutron star. Hot. Leonard Nimoy, aka Spock.

6 Supervillains From History That Make The Joker Look Subtle Look, we're not so far gone that we can't tell the difference between comics and reality. Fiction demands a certain suspension of disbelief, because real-life bad guys understand that dry, drawn-out political subterfuge is much cheaper and more effective than a clone army. Then, occasionally, some crackpot leaps straight off the pages into our world. These are men with brazen, insane and often ridiculous plans for world domination that grant him comic book supervillain status. Like ... First of all, look at him: Out of frame, he's cradling a white Persian cat. You could fill a whole article about real-life supervillains from Nazi Germany, but if we're to pick just one to fill our Nazi quota for this article, we're taking Otto Skorzeny, and not just because he looks like every single Bond villain who ever existed. Picture this guy goose-stepping out to "Horst Wessel Lied." But Skorzeny's career as a lone-gun supervillain didn't begin until after the war. Skorzeny didn't even stop there.

Cosmonaut Crashed Into Earth 'Crying In Rage' : Krulwich Wonders... Editor's Note, Updated April 24, 2012: We received many comments and questions on this post, which you can read here. Robert later wrote this update to this story with more details and amendments. So there's a cosmonaut up in space, circling the globe, convinced he will never make it back to Earth; he's on the phone with Alexei Kosygin — then a high official of the Soviet Union — who is crying because he, too, thinks the cosmonaut will die. hide captionVladimir Komarov's remains in an open casket RIA Novosti/Photo Researchers Inc. Vladimir Komarov's remains in an open casket The space vehicle is shoddily constructed, running dangerously low on fuel; its parachutes — though no one knows this — won't work and the cosmonaut, Vladimir Komarov, is about to, literally, crash full speed into Earth, his body turning molten on impact. hide captionGagarin (left) and Komarov out hunting RIA Novosti /Photo Researchers, Inc Gagarin (left) and Komarov out hunting The problem was Gagarin. Americans Died, Too

Salyut programme Salyut 7, the final Salyut station to be launched, as seen from the departing Soyuz T-13 spacecraft The Salyut programme (Russian: Салю́т, IPA: [sɐˈlʲut], Salute or Fireworks) was the first space station programme undertaken by the Soviet Union, which consisted of a series of four crewed scientific research space stations and two crewed military reconnaissance space stations over a period of 15 years from 1971 to 1986. Two other Salyut launches failed. Salyut broke several spaceflight records, including several mission duration records, the first ever orbital handover of a space station from one crew to another, and various spacewalk records. Mir-2 (DOS-8), the final spacecraft from the Salyut series, became one of the first modules of the ISS, and the first module of the ISS, Russian-made Zarya, relied heavily on technologies developed in the Salyut programme. History of Salyut space stations[edit] Initially the space stations were to be named Zarya, the Russian word for 'Dawn'.

11 Modern Technologies That Are Way Older Than You Think Believed to have been invented in... 1954, by Dee Horton and Lew Hewitt. These two Texans designed the first automatic door after noticing how strong winds would fuck with people's door opening abilities. The pair got to work on their product and, before long, people across the world were walking up to automatic doors, hesitating, thinking "fuck, it broke?," continuing, halting abruptly, shielding their face with their hands and then flinching, humiliated as the door opened with perfect comedic timing. Horton and Hewitt went on to found Horton Automatics, one of the biggest sellers of automatic doors today, with a massive range of clients including McDonald's and Tim Horton's Donuts (Nepotism?). Actually invented in... Around 50 BC, by Hero of Alexandria. Fucktasticly named Hero was a Greek engineer, mathematician, inventor, teacher and overachiever who is believed to have lived somewhere around the second century. 1901, by the Germans. The 7th Century AD, by the Greeks. "Science: 1.

6 Artists Whose Weird Fetishes Defined Pop Culture It doesn't take a cinema genius to catch that most of Martin Scorsese's movies feature violent sociopaths. And you don't need to be a horror/geography wunderkind to notice that every Stephen King book is about an unexplainable evil being evil in New England. Those trademarks are part of the reason we like the work of those guys. But what's really interesting are the artists who have been flaunting their bizarre fixations in our faces for years but have never been called out on them. Joss Whedon Clearly Has a Foot Fetish If geek fandom was a high school, Whedon would be its resident golden boy jock. Ladies. The secret trademark: It's definitely a creepy foot fetish. When you really think about it, it's not that often that you see bare feet on the little screen. To be fair, most of these do belong to Summer Glau's character, River, who was supposed to be the show's psychic warrior dancer of sorts (you know how all dancers hate shoes). Man, feminism is easy! Bathrooms. Dr. And it's gorgeous!

Comedies That Should Have Been Awesome (And Weren't) All of our favorite comedians phone it in for the paycheck once and a while. We can look the other way when Will Ferrell slums it up in loose, runny stool like Bewitched, so long as he's still writing and starring in great stuff like Talladega Nights. Sacha Baron Cohen made Borat: if he wants to pay for a new pool with a shitty cameo in Madagascar, who are we to judge? But what happens when it's not a "phone it in" comedy? What if it's a labor of love? Well, then you get snarky no-talents like us picking apart your crappy movie in this article, apparently. School for Scoundrels (2006) THE PITCH: Scot Armstrong and Todd Phillips, the writer and director of Old School, reteam for this black comedy! THE PAYOFF: Jon Heder and Billy Bob Thornton aren't masters of improvisation. THE PROBLEM: Scoundrels makes the mistake of thinking anybody watches a comedy for its plot, spending one dull scene after another spelling out who's doing what to who and why. Nothing But Trouble (1991)

Science/Nature | First dog in space died within hours The dog Laika, the first living creature to orbit the Earth, did not live nearly as long as Soviet officials led the world to believe. The animal, launched on a one-way trip on board Sputnik 2 in November 1957, was said to have died painlessly in orbit about a week after blast-off. Now, it has been revealed she died from overheating and panic just a few hours after the mission started. The new evidence was presented at the recent World Space Congress in Houston, Texas, US, by Dimitri Malashenkov of the Institute for Biological Problems in Moscow. Noted space historian Sven Grahn told BBC News Online that the new information was surprising and significant as it ended more than 40 years of speculation about Laika's fate. Space pioneer Laika's mission on board Sputnik 2 stunned the world. It was a metal sphere weighing about 18 kg (40 lbs) and was far heavier than anything the United States was contemplating launching. Racing pulse Death in space Dr Malashenkov also revealed how Laika died.

Soyuz 11 Soyuz 11 (Russian: Союз 11, Union 11) was the first and only manned mission to board the world's first space station, Salyut 1 (Soyuz 10 had soft-docked but had not been able to enter due to latching issues).[5] The mission arrived at the space station on 7 June 1971 and departed on 30 June. The mission ended in disaster when the crew capsule depressurised during preparations for reentry, killing the three-man crew.[6] This accident resulted in the only human deaths to occur in space (as opposed to high atmosphere).[7] The crew members aboard Soyuz 11 were Vladislav Volkov, Georgi Dobrovolski, and Viktor Patsayev.[8][9][10] Crew[edit] Backup crew[edit] Original crew[edit] Crew notes[edit] The original prime crew for Soyuz 11 consisted of Alexei Leonov, Valeri Kubasov and Pyotr Kolodin. Mission highlights[edit] The Soyuz 7K-OKS spacecraft was launched on 7 June 1971, from Baikonur Cosmodrome in central Kazakh SSR. Death of crew[edit] It quickly became apparent that they had asphyxiated.