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Self-compassion - A Healthier Way of Relating to Yourself

Self-compassion - A Healthier Way of Relating to Yourself
The relentless search for high self-esteem has become a virtual religion; and a tyrannical one at that. Our competitive culture tells us we need to be special and above average to feel good about ourselves, but we can’t all be above average at the same time. There is always someone richer, more attractive, or successful than we are. And even when we do manage to feel self-esteem for one golden moment, we can’t hold on to it. Our sense of self-worth bounces around like a ping-pong ball, rising and falling in lock-step with our latest success or failure. Fortunately, there is an alternative to self-esteem that many psychologists believe is a better and more effective path to happiness: self-compassion.

http://www.self-compassion.org/

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Kate Bratskeir: 9 & 1/2 Things I'm Not Stressing Over Anymore Something I find fascinating: You can literally throw away your negative thoughts. In a study done last November, participants were told write down their personal, invalidating beliefs on paper. Those who got to crumple their inner demons and dunk them a la NBA player Terrence Ross into a wastebasket (so maybe it wasn't as dramatic, but I like to imagine) were less likely to be bogged down by their negativity. Could the same be true for stressful thoughts? As a GPS for the Soul editor -- someone who reads, writes, Tweets and preaches about stress management all day -- I have my own tools that work when stress rears its repugnant head. I know when it's time to step away from the computer for a break.

How to Explore and Study Intention: 10 steps Edit Article Edited by George AP, Teresa, Flickety, Daniel and 10 others Intention is a surprisingly important, but rarely explored part of the mind, as its significance is only important after the fact. Go Easy on Yourself, a New Wave of Research Urges Stuart Bradford Do you treat yourself as well as you treat your friends and family? That simple question is the basis for a burgeoning new area of psychological research called self-compassion — how kindly people view themselves. People who find it easy to be supportive and understanding to others, it turns out, often score surprisingly low on self-compassion tests, berating themselves for perceived failures like being overweight or not exercising.

To Clear Negative Thoughts, Physically Throw Them Away: Study Bothered by negative thoughts? Clearing your mind of them could be as simple as writing them down and physically throwing them away, according to a new study, published in the journal Psychological Science. "At some level, it can sound silly. But we found that it really works -- by physically throwing away or protecting your thoughts, you influence how you end up using those thoughts," study researcher Richard Petty, of Ohio State University, said in a statement. "Merely imagining engaging in these actions has no effect."

Kelly mcgonigal Willpower Workshop Slides: FACESWillpowerSLIDES (color slides in PDF form, best for viewing on device) FACESWillpowerHANDOUTS (slides in grayscale 6-per-page handout form, best for printing) Compassion Workshop Slides: FACESBarrierstoCompassionSLIDES (color slides in PDF form, best for viewing on device) FACESBarrierstoCompassionHANDOUTS (slides in grayscale 6-per-page handout form, best for printing) The Beginner’s Guide to Zen Habits – A Guided Tour ‘Smile, breathe and go slowly.’ ~Thich Nhat Hanh By Leo Babauta What if the Secret to Success Is Failure? Over the course of the next year and a half, Duckworth worked with Levin and Randolph to turn the list of seven strengths into a two-page evaluation, a questionnaire that could be completed by teachers or parents, or by students themselves. For each strength, teachers suggested a variety of “indicators,” much like the questions Duckworth asked people to respond to on her grit questionnaire, and she road-tested several dozen of them at Riverdale and KIPP. She eventually settled on the 24 most statistically reliable ones, from “This student is eager to explore new things” (an indicator of curiosity) to “This student believes that effort will improve his or her future” (optimism).

RELIEVING STRESS - MIND OVER MUSCLE YOU ARE SITTING AT YOUR DESK finishing an important report. You have been working on it for two months, and it is due in 30 minutes. You feel that you need at least another week to finish. Your boss is screaming in the next office; he is already in a foul mood. ''This is it,'' you say to yourself, ''I can't take it anymore. I'll run away and live in Tahiti. If You Want A Certain Culture, Then Act That Way If you want a certain culture, then act that way. Here’s a nice little nugget of wisdom from one of our favourite organisational thought leaders at the moment, Henry Cloud. The message is simple. If you want a certain culture, then do more of that deed. A culture is powerful. It has the ability to help us thrive or suck the life out of us.

Meditation Makes Us Act with Compassion You’re in a waiting room, seated next to two other people. There are only three chairs. A woman enters on crutches, a medical boot on one leg. She winces, checks her phone, sighs uncomfortably, and leans against the wall. Neither of the other people responds. What Happy People Do Differently The secret of happiness is a concern of growing importance in the modern era, as increased financial security has given many the time to focus on self-growth. No longer hunter-gatherers concerned with where to find the next kill, we worry instead about how to live our best lives. Happiness books have become a cottage industry; personal-development trainings are a bigger business than ever.

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