Characteristics of Narcissistic Mothers
1. Everything she does is deniable. There is always a facile excuse or an explanation. Cruelties are couched in loving terms. Aggressive and hostile acts are paraded as thoughtfulness. Selfish manipulations are presented as gifts. She rarely says right out that she thinks you're inadequate. Many of her putdowns are simply by comparison. Because her abusiveness is part of a lifelong campaign of control and because she is careful to rationalize her abuse, it is extremely difficult to explain to other people what is so bad about her. 2. Any attempt at autonomy on your part is strongly resisted. 3. 4. 5. She will deliver generalized barbs that are almost impossible to rebut (always in a loving, caring tone): "You were always difficult" "You can be very difficult to love" "You never seemed to be able to finish anything" "You were very hard to live with" "You're always causing trouble" "No one could put up with the things you do." 6. Narcissists gaslight routinely. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13.
Related: Family of Origin
• narcissistic personality