You And Me Could Write A Bipartisan Romance. Some Callers Are Proper Dementor. Why I don't cook at home. Undead Updates. Adventures in Babysitting. I drew a couple of Bobcats. The Land Of The Free From Thought. Going Through a Rough Patch. It's the quintessential symbol of Halloween: the Jack-O-Lantern. Fortunately, it's also one of the easiest designs for a baker to make. Just take one round cake, ice it in orange, add a cartoony face, and...voilá!
Er. Heh, sorry. Let's try that again. Voila! That's...not a cake. [rolling up sleeves] Voila! Is that...plastic? Cheater. Voila! A Pumpkin Poo-nicorn. [through gritted teeth] Voi-la. What the...what IS that? Allow me to retract that last statement. Knock, knock. Well? Hm. [blinking] Um... [more blinking] Dorota, Carra M., Melody N., Shanna T., Andrew M., Ted, Donny & Amanda, Kaitlin K., & T.A., don't ask me; I'm going with "abstract jack-o-lantern. " No Happy Ending. The First Rickroll In Space. Less Than Meets The Eye. Bizarre Traffic Accidents. Bizarre Traffic Accidents Weird | October 22, 2010 / views: Warning: Creating default object from empty value in /home/weirdex/public_html/includes/functions_core.php on line 260 19,613 For some of these photos, I wonder how it is possible that something like this happened. Seems unreal to me... What do You think? Student Hides Rick Astley's Song In College Paper. They Call Me...Tater Salad.
Hate Weird Facebook Guys (Eminem Parody) - CollegeHumor video. Regular Wrecks. Magic Marker. Panties for Geeks’ Girlfriends. Panties for Geeks' Girlfriends Fun | October 18, 2010 / views: Warning: Creating default object from empty value in /home/weirdex/public_html/includes/functions_core.php on line 260 19,430 Girls, these panties are the best choice if Your boyfriend spends much time in front of computer. Happy Boss'es...Boss'...Bosses...Bossy Day! Quick! How do you spell the singular possessive of "boss? " Nooo... Well, there IS an apostrophe...but no. (Also, what is that? A frosted book?) You're getting closer. Not that letter. Wait. A-HA!! [rubbing temples with eyes closed] Um. Now, "possessive" means that... I'm really starting to question your taste level. And you still spelled "you're" wrong. Look, I don't think avoiding the issue is the answer. [sigh] Alright, look, you want to see the perfect cake to get your boss?
Then here: Mission accomplished. Jeneec K., Eric, Annette, Michelle O., Jennifer N., Angela P., Mandy W., Kate C., & Anony M., I say from now on we call it "Bossy Day. " Note from John: Yes. Holy Military Secrets, Batman! Google Maps Revealed The Air Force's Hidden Weapon! Non Sequitur Comic Strip on GoComics. On Completely Different Wavelengths.
Ten possible pranks to play on a friend (No survey, no effort!) Facebook Fan Page: Ten possible pranks to play on a friend (No survey, no effort!) Swap the number of their partner and their mum in the phonebook of their mobile, embarrasing and potential devastating, but well worth it! Order a taxi from every single local taxi company to their house, all with their name… I advise using a new sim card! Depending on how serious you are, prostitutes can be used too!! Take their iPhone/iPod Touch and move every single application to another page, takes ages to get sorted! Lean a bin filled with water against their door so when they open it all chaos breaks out! Coat their soap in clear nail varnish so when they rub it doesn’t create any suds! Hide an alarm or two within their bedroom and set them to 3am, set their phone alarm for good measure. DOUBLE: Swap two of your friends TV remotes (have to be the same!)
Find a nice moist dog poo, place it in a plastic bag, wrap the bag so it is almost bursting, and leave under the handle of their car! Sesame Street: Smell Like A Monster. Not Even Superheroes Should Friend Their Mothers On Facebook. No Offense. Since our posts here on CW invariably manage to offend someone - carrot lovers, grammar Nazis, Canadians - we've decided that *today's* commentary won't be offensive to anyone.
Literally. In fact, it's going to be SO inoffensive that I'm trying not to fall asleep as I type thikjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj Huh? What? Where am I? I forgot to mention that I'll be randomly choosing cakes from our archives, so there's really no telling what cakes we'll end up with. Okay, here goes. "Hey-o! Huh, this inoffensive stuff is easy! Okay, next we have cake #245... Hm. Alright, so this is kind of hard difficult. Cake #8,062: [biting lip] Uh. [looks up e-mail] Well, according to Stetson here, this is actually a bakery display in Colombia. Yeah, I think I'm hitting my stride again. Next! Cake #4,207: [crickets chirping] OH COME ON!!
Okay, last one. Cake #2,093: I give up. Denise, Lisa M., Stetson J., Brindy W., Karin D., & Megan C., if you're still reading this, thanks. The Cup Is Half Empty Kinda Guy. A Sign That Tells The Future Is A Sign. FoxTrot Comic Strip on GoComics. Down With EPP! Friends, countrypersons, cake lovers. Today I come to you on a matter of grave concern. (And no, I don't mean that one.) You all know of my longstanding stance on that most unholy of creations; the cupcake cake. [patooie!] Well, friends, today I bring a new acronym upon which I must heap disdain and revile-attude of such revulsion that I actually had to make up a word just to describe it. That acronym? And it stands for...
Edible Photo Printing. No, not Hannah Montana. A hat...wearing a guy? I don't even... Ok, you have GOT to be... Sound guy: Um. 'Cause I'll wait. Sound guy: No no, please. You're sure. Sound guy: Yeah, yeah, we're good! [meaningful glare] Sound guy: [innocent smile] Alright. Thanks to Grace W., Dana W., (not related) Silvia C., Lara K., Kelli, and of course my favorite Wreckporter, Jo... It Takes Over One Hundred Cellphones To Propose Marriage Properly. Betty free online comic strip library at comics. Calvin and Hobbes Comic Strip on GoComics. For Better or For Worse Comic Strip on GoComics. Over the Hedge free online comic strip library at comics. Calvin and Hobbes Comic Strip on GoComics. Arts & Living: Comics (washingtonpost.com)
Arts & Living: Comics (washingtonpost.com) Get Fuzzy free online comic strip library at comics. How Tron Should Really Look In 2010. Not So Smart-Phone. Cake Secrets. This what cellphones will look like in 2018! (Ursa) Major Pain In The A** His Groceries Have Just Been Terminated. Ba-Loony. It's the beginner's basic: one round(ish) glob o' icing, and one string. And yet... Yeeeeah. Er, sorry, but I'm afraid writing it doesn't make it true. Well, I AM seeing something that starts with a "B"... [looking around] Er... [waving] Hi, kids! Dude. You know what to do when you see packs of wild balloons running in opposite directions, right?
Thaaat's right: Check the expiration on all your prescription meds. Look at this next Wreck long enough, and you'll begin to ask yourself some interesting questions: Questions like, "Which way is up? "Oh. Look out, Kerri. Which reminds me: I bet it's a girl. Early C., Tracy C., Heather P., Tiffany H., Vikki, Kim M., Kerri K., & Stacey, I'd say something about the sprinkles, but that just seems rude, you know? Bread And Prejudice. The Little Black Book - Pyronia.com.
The Horse Auction. - Pyronia.com. Library Staff Are Very Amen-able. A Floridian's Fall Trip. [running in] YOU GUYS! Did you know it's FALL?!? Seriously! Fall! Already! I think I just pooped a pumpkin! At least I'm not the only one. So, now that I know it's officially "Fall," I think I'll kick off my flip-flops, crank the air down to 78 (which may take a while, since it's [checking temperature] ooh, down to 92!) Let's see... Uh, perhaps we're "going" a bit too literally. Well, thank goodness for big plastic leaves, at least: I mean, just try to imagine this pair without them.
And what says "Fall" better than a bunch of plastic leaves? A bunch of plastic leaves with the WORD "Fall," that's what. Well, one thing's for sure: when the Pod People come, this will make them think twice before going after the Wreckerators. You know, an optimist would say these scarecrows are half icing, half plastic: ...a pessimist would say they're just half-a$$ed. It's a swirl! GLITTER SWIRLY SPRINKLE FALL CAKE! So in closing... ...Happ Fall Ya'll. Split Over Musical (Price) Differences. Split Over Musical (Price) Differences Customer: “Do you have [popular album]?” Me: “Yep. It’s right over here.” Customer: “That’s expensive.” Me: “That’s pretty average” Customer: “I bet [competitor] is cheaper.” Me: “I doubt it. Customer: “I don’t know. Me: “I don’t think they will be, but they are right upstairs if you want to take a peek and come back.
(The customer leaves and comes back 15 minutes later with our competitors bag.) Me: “Oh, were they cheaper?” Customer: “No, they were a lot more expensive. In Honer of Our Hero's. My fellow Americans, today is a day to say: Or perhaps: But only if you know Evan, of course. And what "Vetrens" are.Otherwise that'd just be weird.Because today, my friends, is a day to celebrate those brave men and women who fought for that most important thing worth fighting for: The head of the Statue of Liberty. No, wait. Aha! "FREE Dom! " Whoever "Dom" is. Today is also a day to celebrate that black slime alien guy from Star Trek: Only we must do it patriotically: Perfect. And so, in conclusion, and in "honer" of "Vetrans" Day... [smirk] ...allow me to say to all of our wonderful veterans: O.o Perhaps I should rephrase that. [head tilt] Naaah. Thanks to Sandy K., Holly J., Jeff D., Sue D., Monica E., Tori L., Dana S., and anyone else who can successfully spell "heroes," "veteran," and "honor" after reading this post.
Environ-mental. Wet The Appetite. Wet The Appetite (A young woman approaches the front register with a dead Siamese fighting fish in a cup.) Customer: “I want a refund on my fish. All the fish I buy here keep dying! This is my 3rd replacement. Me: “I’m very sorry for that miss. Customer: “Well when I first get one it’s completely fine. Me: “Ok, well what were you feeding it?
Customer:“Feeding it? Me: “Yes of course they do. Customer: “Wow, really?! The Frozen Wastes. Well, That's Horrifying. How Different Age Groups Celebrate Halloween. All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2015 Matthew Inman. Please don't steal. TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2015 Matthew Inman. Please don't steal. TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP. Internal Wisdom. We here at Cake Wrecks realize that often there are readers who simply. don't. get it. So, in an effort to "bring the funny" to our few humor-challenged readers, we have enlisted the services of our intern, Britnee, to help translate. To our regular readers: please bear with us. We will resume our regular posting tomorrow. And now, take it away, Britnee! Like, OMG! You're totally gonna laugh. So, there's this cake, right? See, what happened was, the guy that ordered the cake actually wanted actual FLOWERS on the cake.
And this is, like, totally hilarious: LOL So, here, a guy wanted a cake to say "Schwager House" - which is totes redonk - but he wanted it written out in all capital letters. Check this out: so, next, this lady, Madalene, wanted a cake for her son and some junk, and she, like, wanted the cake to say "#1" on it. Hi-LAAAAAAAR-ious!!! See, the cake says "#1 ON IT" ON the cake!!! And then there was this guy, Dennis? {{{dying with laughter}}} {catching breath...} Wait.
Computers Increase The Chance Of Identity Theft. Computers Increase The Chance Of Identity Theft (A customer is requesting a refund on a computer.) Me: “I’m sorry, sir. I cannot give you a refund on your computer.” Customer: “What?! Why the not?!” Me: “You don’t have a receipt. Customer: “I’ll have you know, I’m a lawyer and I could sue you for everything you’ve got!” Me: “We only have a 30 day refund policy. Customer: “I’m an assistant attorney general, and I will have you reported! Me: “Okay, sir. Customer: “Don’t you take that tone with me! Me: “If there is nothing else, I’m going to have to ask you to remove your device and leave.”
Customer: “You can’t tell me to leave! Me: “Please calm down and leave.” Customer: “Do you have any idea who I am?!” Me: “Do you?” Sunday Sweets Goes Back to the Future! All Hallow's Wrecks. Dueling Disasters. Bum Voyage. Go Directly To School, Do Not Pass Go. It Will Be All Right Angled On The Night. When The Shoe Is On The Other Foot. Strategic Strategery. The Sperm Count. - Pyronia.com. Overly Realistic Buck Hunter - CollegeHumor video. Cartoon Bears Are Still Bears - CollegeHumor video. The advantage of a video phone. - Pyronia.com.
The Toilet Mug — Prank a Buddy. Inappropriate Children’s Toys. Suffering From A-Salt.