My Cardboard Life. Cyanide & Happiness. Bug. Oglaf. Nedroid. Jess Fink. Hark, a vagrant. Romantically Apocalyptic. To anyone who finds this tooth memory card and the messages left within... My name is Charles Snippy and I am probably the last sane human being left on Earth. I know not whether you will understand this message. I know not whether you'll even be able to decode the ones and zeros on this data card. I know not whether my voice will ever reach anyone. I know not whether the microscopic drives will last long enough and whether the plastic and metal parts will not disintegrate into dust as centuries pass or whether the titanium shell encasing them will remain in place or be consumed by the ever-changing landscape, lost forever.
If you are still human, then this will be a story about the collapse of the civilization of your forefathers through greed and arrogance. I've been narrating my life to myself as an exercise recommended long ago by an "online psychiatrist" as a way to "maintain sanity" in "highly stressful situations".
Well... ...Where to begin? "M'YEES... "Awgh, come on! "