No Bad Kids – Toddler Discipline Without Shame (9 Guidelines) Posted by janet on Apr 29th, 2010 A toddler acting out is not shameful, nor is it behavior that needs punishing.
It’s a cry for attention, a shout-out for sleep, or a call to action for firmer, more consistent limits. It is the push-pull of your toddler testing his burgeoning independence. He has the overwhelming impulse to step out of bounds, while also desperately needing to know he is securely reined in. There is no question that children need discipline. The key to healthy and effective discipline is our attitude. Here are some guidelines: 1) Begin with a predictable environment and realistic expectations. 2) Don’t be afraid, or take misbehavior personally. 3) Respond in the moment, calmly, like a CEO. Lectures, emotional reactions, scolding and punishments do not give our toddler the clarity he needs, and can create guilt and shame. 4) Speak in first person. 5) No time out. 6) Consequences. 7) Don’t discipline a child for crying. 8) Unconditional love. 9) Spanking – NEVER.
6 Ways to Help Children Cope with Frustration. Wednesday, March 6th, 2013 by Katie Hurley from Baby Steps It’s no big secret that little kids tend to have very big emotions.
They laugh the loudest when something is funny; they cry the hardest when they fall, and their screams echo throughout the land when something seems unfair. Yes, little kids have big emotions. Particularly when it comes to frustration. Frustration is a very normal part of life. Here are six ways you can help them work through their frustration: Encourage expression of emotions: When kids get upset out natural inclination is to jump into problem-solving mode. Create balance: Setting limits and maintaining consistency is essential for young children. Break it down: It’s difficult to stand back and watch when you know that that tower is destined to fall, but little kids often learn by trial and error. Take breaks: Rely on humor: A little silly behavior can go a long way toward healing a frustrated soul. Play board games: Executive Leadership Skills. Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook, has been making headlines for several weeks following the release of her new book, Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead.
As she has been making the rounds of talk shows and events, promoting her book, she has been quoted time and again suggesting that we stop labeling little girls “bossy” and instead describe them as having “executive leadership skills.” “I wrote this book because I want to ban the word ‘bossy’ from the language. I would like every parent who’s about to call their daughter bossy to say, ‘My daughter’s not bossy, she has executive leadership skills.’” [source] Like many women, teachers, caregivers, and human beings in society, I agree (passionately) with the heart of her message, which I believe is about the deeper, unspoken messages we tend to give little girls in contrast with those that we give little boys (like: be quiet, be sweet, get along, don’t make waves, make sure people like you).
Don’t we? True leaders are not bossy. Take a CALMS Approach to Your Crying Baby. Is The “Happiest Baby On The Block” the Most Oppressed?
Why I’m Not A Fan of the “5S” Method Of Calming Crying Babies, continues to generate a lot of interest and (sometimes) heated discussion, eight months after it was first published. One of the biggest arguments in favor of Dr. Karp’s “Happiest Baby” books and videos, is that the technique works to calm babies and gives desperate parents useful tools, and some relief from infant crying, which is often referred to as colic, but is more accurately described as The Period of PURPLE Crying. Some of you may be interested to know that the only published research regarding the usefulness of the “Happiest Baby” method indicates: “The behavioral intervention, when (training for parents is) provided via videotape, does not seem to be efficacious in decreasing total crying among normal infants.”
Additionally, there was no difference in the Parent Stress Index between the intervention and nonintervention groups at the 6 week mark. No Bad Kids – Toddler Discipline Without Shame (9 Guidelines)