People Who Can't Control Themselves Control The People Around Them Part 2. "People who can't control themselves control the people around them. When you rely on someone for a positive reflected sense of self, you invariably try to control him or her. " Recently I wrote about the importance of emotional autonomy. (available here .) When you can't manage your own emotional life, you invariably (deliberately or unknowingly) enlist other people to help you handle your feelings and maintain your emotional equilibrium.
Beside pressing other people into service, your interpersonal relationships become devoted to this task. The result is your marriage and family become rigid, stifling, stale, and unable to blossom because of the over-riding mandate for emotional regulation. Emotional Autonomy: The key to interdependence I'm sure some readers asked themselves, "Where does healthy interdependence fit in? " Interdependence as a concept has been around for years, but it is badly misunderstood. Emotional autonomy is the key to interdependence. . © 2011 by Crucible Institute. How To Make Your Relationship Unshakable - 7 Pillars Of Strong Relationships « A Miracle A Day A Miracle A Day. 101 Ways to Love Each Other. I think we dream so we don’t have to be apart so long. If we’re in each other’s dreams, we can be together all the time. - Calvin & Hobbes Expressing love to our partners, children, family and friends not only strengthens communication it also improves connection and intimacy.
Too often we get distracted by the trivial and forget how important it is to nurture our relationships. Finding simple, but heartfelt ways to love each other is a source of encouragement for the giver and the receiver. By loving consciously, we discover Love is the force that puts the world back together when it feels like it’s coming apart. Consider these ways to love each other and help create a world where beauty and grace can fill the hearts of everyone willing to give and then receive Love’s gentle power: Don’t wait to say, “I love you.” Where is #101? The list ended at number 100 because I invite you to share in Comments (below) your ideas. Dr. Barton's Top 10 Relationship Killers. Top 10 Relationship Killers The saddest thing I hear on the therapy couch is someone telling me that they've killed their relationship through what they have or haven't done. In fact, certain actions are relationship killers.
Here are some areas where action-or inaction-will make all the difference. 1. Money. It is the number one cause of divorce . If a partner has been unscrupulous, getting the trust back can be a challenge. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. It's not very complicated. Dr. Top 15 Dumb Mistakes People Make in Relationships. One of my friends recently asked his girlfriend, “What’s one dumb thing I do in the relationship?” She looked at him in shock, “Where do I begin? If it has to be one, I’d just say you can be a real ****.” “What!” He replied, “How dare you.
Now it’s my turn.” A dam wall broke. An hour later the couple finished talking. After studying communication for almost a decade, I notice we make many dumb relationship mistakes and communication errors that I’m about to share with you. 1. Being ignorant is not so much a shame, as being unwilling to learn.Benjamin Franklin Men are more guilty than women in withholding feelings from their partner. 2.
You choose a path; a direction, not an immediate outcome. We may withhold feelings from someone because we reject emotion. 3. Whatever one of us blames in another, each one will find in his own heart.Seneca The failure to healthily express emotion can show itself through blame, a common relationship mistake. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. Relationship Rules. Human beings crave intimacy, need to love and be loved. Yet people have much trouble doing so.
It's clear from the many letters I get that lots of folks have no idea what a healthy relationship even looks like. Because I care about these things, and care about the environments children grow in, I'm using this space as an attempt to remedy the problem—again. From many sources and many experts, I have culled some basic rules of relationships. This is by no means an exhaustive list. But it's a start. Choose a partner wisely and well. 12 Core Boundaries To Live By in Life, Dating, & Relationships. Love Isn't Blind. Of all the decisions you make in your life, few are as important as who you choose to marry or live with. Make a bad choice and you can spend your days and nights mired in unhappiness or consumed by anxiety or depression, conditions that not only rob your mental health but undermine your physical health as well.
You might be consigned to economic instability or subjected to physical or verbal abuse. Or you might find yourself struggling as a single parent. The consequences of a poor choice, and of marital dissatisfaction or even disruption, are far-reaching, extending even to the next generation. So do yourself a big favor and make sure you choose a mate wisely. Love isn't blind at all. Step One: You meet someone you like—and, importantly, someone who demonstrates unquestionably that feelings are mutual. As you grow to know someone, says Van Epp, you determine what you can and can't trust.
These are the five bonding forces that form the glue of your relationship, he stresses. 75 Ways to Show Love - For Healthy Relationships. 10 Basic Truths About Keeping Your Relationship Healthy. I think it's easy to make things more complicated than they need to be. Here are some basic rules of the relationship road that will keep you headed in the right direction. 1. Successful relationships take work. They don't happen in a vacuum. They occur when the couples in them take the risk of sharing what it is that's going on in their hearts and heads. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10.
There are no guarantees, but couples who practice these techniques have longer and stronger relationships than those who are not proactive in their love. Dr. Intimate Relationships. Maren Cardillo Northwestern University This paper reveals a theory of personality based on the formation of intimate relationships during the early stages of a person's lifetime. During infancy, childhood, adolescence, and young adulthood, new needs and tensions arise in the individual. In attempt to seek ways of adapting to these newfound stresses, people develop different kinds of intimate relationships that ultimately form their personality. Relationships formed during each stage of life serve as a prototype for interactions in later stages.
For this reason, there exists a continuum of relationships formed throughout a lifetime that shape and mold specific personality traits. Neither intimacy nor individual development can exist alone. The birth of a child initiates a human being into a life-long process of mutual adaptation between the child, his or her intimate relationship partners and the broader social environment.