5 Popular Zombie Survival Tactics (That Will Get You Killed) Everybody has a zombie contingency plan. A unique and ingenious stratagem they've spent hours contemplating that ensures they and their loved ones will stay alive in the event of a zombie apocalypse. The only problem? You've got the exact same essential plan as everybody else: go raid the gun store, get out of the cities as fast as possible, find a sturdy base to fortify and hole up in, use a melee weapon whenever possible to conserve ammo and--if the worst does come to pass and you find yourself facing down a crowd of the undead--take your time, aim carefully and make every shot a head shot. Jesus, you're not going to last five minutes. Here's why:
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Every Saturday, Cracked lets someone from another website do the update for us. They get to show off their stuff to our fans, and we get to be lazy while someone else does our job for us. In the latest example of our convenient selflessness, former Cracked writer Matt Wilson of the International Society of Supervillains lays out some sure signs you're about to be swarmed by the living dead. It's as if it's almost Halloween or something. Your first instinct during a crisis is to go to your mall. 6 Signs You're About to be Attacked by Zombies
How 7 Iconic Movie Characters Would Do In a Zombie Attack There's not a movie on Earth that wouldn't be drastically improved by the addition of zombies. Whether it's a romantic comedy, a buddy cop flick or a documentary about global warming, the inclusion of a sudden attack by relentless, blood-thirsty zombies is a surefire way to make any movie more compelling, more thrilling and more award-winning. To demonstrate this principle, we've hired a team of elite screenwriting geniuses who, using the finest Pentium computers available, are busy rewriting the classic movies of our age to include zombies.
25 Hidden Upsides to Living in a Zombie Apocalypse Slideshow
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5 Popular Zombie Survival Tactics (That Will Get You Killed)
We found out recently that if you try to leave a little kid in a graveyard late at night, he'll freak out. Even if you offer to leave him a gun to protect himself. Why? 5 Scientific Reasons a Zombie Apocalypse Could Actually Happen
Let's pretend for a moment that zombies are real (as if half of you weren't already daydreaming about that very thing). Have you noticed how most zombie movies take place only after the apocalypse is in full-swing? By the time we join our survivors, the military and government are already wiped out, and none of the streets are safe. There's a reason the movie starts there, and not earlier. It's because the early part, where we go from one zombie to millions, doesn't make any sense. If you let the creeping buzzkill of logic into the zombie party, you realize the zombies would all be re-dead long before you even got a chance to fire up that chainsaw motorcycle you've been working on. 7 Scientific Reasons a Zombie Outbreak Would Fail (Quickly)
12 Gadgets to Survive the Apocalypse Now is a good time to ponder the apocalypse. Iran and North Korea are going nuclear, the wonky weather is a harbinger of catastrophic climate change, and end-of-the-world blockbusters abound. (Tim Burton's '9' came out last week and '2012,' 'The Road,' and 'Zombieland' are all coming up later this fall.) In that dismal spirit, the Switched team has gathered its first choices for last-chance gadgetry -- a collection of 12 must-haves if society is in peril, whether it be by fire or ice, zombies or aliens. Using our handy "What Type of Apocalypse Will It Be?"
Public restrooms serve as both a creative playground for horrible people, and also as an outlet for those who like wrecking a place. Beware: it's dangerous in there.&&(navigator.userAgent.indexOf('Tri Public Restrooms