Dear blank, please blank. As My Junk. F You, Auto Correct! - iphone funny autocorrect. Shitmydadsays (shitmydadsays) - shitmydadsays. Justin Samuel Halpern was born in a tiny fishing village called “San Diego.” There he spent most of his life being yelled at by his father. Then he transcribed those things on a twitter page called “@shitmydadsays.” Then he wrote a book of the same name. Then he co-created a shitty TV show of the same name. Then, when he had exploited the success of someone else’s words as much as he possibly could, he started this site with his long time friend and conspiracy theorist, Ryan Walter. His sole purpose is to make just enough money to pay Ryan a salary so he can buy raw goat’s milk, the only milk that hasn’t been poisoned by the government/illuminati.
You can buy his first book, Shit My Dad Says HERE. Lamebook – Funny Facebook Statuses, Fails, LOLs and More – The Original. Operating Systems. Tech Support: "May I ask what operating system you are running today? "Customer: "A computer. " A girl walked into the computer center where I work. She said she was having problems with her Mac. I asked what kind of Mac she had. In an indignant voice, she replied, "Duh, Intosh. " Tech Support: "What operating system are you running? After conferring with her husband, it turned out she owned a Macintosh with System 8.1. Tech Support: "What version of Windows are you running? " A kid in my class joined a conversation I was having about older computers. Him: "I have the oldest Windows ever at my house.
Tech Support: "What operating system do you run? " Tech Support: "Do you know what operating system you're on? " Customer: "I don't use DOS. One time I had to walk a Windows 95 user through a particular procedure. Me: "First you need to open DOS-prompt. My Friend: "I just installed Windows 98. " My Friend: "What's your operating system? " Friend: "I heard about this thing called 'Linux'. " I went pale. ~*~ Bruce Campbell Facts ~*~ Watch Verizon Wireless Surprises Customer Video. Coolest Wrestling Move You'll Ever See Video. Door To Door Atheists Bother Mormons Video. The Perfect Man and the Perfect Woman. Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course, perfect.
One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple was driving their perfect car (a Grand Caravan) along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help. There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident. Who was the survivor? The perfect woman survived. Women stop reading here, that is the end of the joke.
Men keep scrolling****. So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the perfect woman must have been driving. Really cool way to pick up chicks from tusinde. The Difference Between Men and Women in a Conversation. Never fall asleep in church.