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Retail Rage: "WHY ARE YOU CLOSED! TELL US WHY YOU'RE CLOSED!!!" The 5 Greatest Things Ever Accomplished While High. Cracked.com's new book is now on sale. What follows is one of the classic articles that appear in the book, along with 18 new articles that you can't read anywhere else. Any dreadlocked white guys finding this article after Googling "Drugs Rule" should know that we've given this list about drugs a rule. To make the cut, an accomplishment has to be considered great by people who could pass a field sobriety test.

So no Grateful Dead music. We're sure someone somewhere has enjoyed the Dead perfectly sober, just as there are probably non-Christians who listen to Christian Rock. But we're just as sure that in the grand scheme of things, those people don't count. In fact, because we're masochists, we gave ourselves a strict no music policy, leaving us with ... well, not a whole lot actually.

Francis Crick Discovers DNA Thanks to LSD The Accomplishment: Above: Science? Odile had no idea what they were celebrating. The Drug: LSD. Drugs? Why It Makes Sense: The double helix is essentially the Sgt. Tastefully Offensive | Premium Funny: Japan, you suck at art. ‪The Assumption Song‬‏ ‪Like A Boss (ft. Seth Rogen) - Uncensored Version‬‏

‪Street Cup Stacking‬‏ ‪Cool Notebook Stop Motion Animation‬‏ ‪Don't Jerk Off To This‬‏ ‪Best of G.I. Joe PSAs‬‏ ‪Hilarious White People Spelling Bee: Niggerfaggot‬‏ Funniest Japanese Girls Prank. The 20 Best Movie Drinking Games. It's St Patrick's Day, and no doubt the pressure is on to head downtown for a few jars this evening (or, if you're a student, when doors open). For the budding film fanatic, though, that cuts into viewing time, so here's the ideal way to keep inebriates and cinephiles alike happy. We've compiled some of the best movie drinking games from the collective wisdom of web-based boozers, as well as adding a few on our own. Sci-fi, gangster flicks, comedies and thrillers, classics and modern hits are all catered for.

All of these will get you wasted while doing the public service of keeping you off the streets. Please drink responsibly. The Shining Lazydork is the Wikipedia of movie drinking games, a dedicated resource with hundreds of titles available, including their take on The Shining. Choosing Stanley Kubrick's chiller feels wrong, somehow - after all, it's the tale of an alcoholic falling off the wagon and trying to murder his family. Drink Every Time: AND IF YOU REALLY WANT TO GET WASTED . . . ‪Ned calls about the condom recall‬‏ ‪Ned prank call to a Priest‬‏ Kevin Pereira Flirts With Candace Bailey's Mom in High Definition. PCisms that aren't PC.